Village Boomer

Obituary/Retrospective

2011-06-14T17:49:00.000-07:00

I had intended to blog about my experiences caring for my dear mother-in-law as she lived with Alzheimer’s disease. Unfortunately she lost her battle with the disease on March 18th of this year. Her care kept us all so busy that I was not able to keep up with many things, including this blog. Things are finally now settling down, and I hope to look back on this experience and blog about it with some 20/20 hindsight. I often wonder how my obituary will read. I try to live my life in a manner to create an interesting “read”.

I miss her so much already. She was a grand lady and her obituary is a small testament to her life:

Grand-mu Carol 4/3/24-3/18/11

Carol passed away on March 18, 2011 in the care and company of her children and grandchildren in The Villages Florida. Carol is survived by her husband Burton, Children Kathy (Mat), Elaine (Kevin), Wayne (Cindy), Gary (Carrie), and her grandchildren Erika, Briana & Kelley. She also will be missed by her niece Stephanie and Nephew Brian. She is also survived by her sister Shirley. She was predeceased by two brothers, and her beloved son Billy.

Carol raised her family and spent most of her life in Pendleton NY, and enjoyed her last few years in The Villages Florida being cared for by her Granddaughter Briana.
Carol was a founding member of the Barge canal Optimist Club, an avid quilter, crafter and a Navy Veteran during WW11. She also served many years as committee-person and member of the Pendleton Republican club. She was honored as the City of Lockport Veteran’s day parade Grand Marshall in 2009. She also was honored by the National Optimist Governor. Carol enjoyed bowling into her 80’s and was a champion horse shoe competitor.

After raising her family she embarked on a successful venture selling Bernina sewing machines and teaching sewing classes in the family Appliance store, Ramming Appliance. Donations to Hospice, or Optimist International would be appreciated.

VOTE!

2010-10-30T10:53:00.001-07:00

Don' forget to vote!

Each man must for himself alone decide what is right and what is wrong, which course is patriotic and which isn't.

~Mark Twain

Thankful for Daughters!

2010-10-24T07:10:00.000-07:00

Your daughter will hold your hand for a little while, but will hold your heart for a lifetime. It's national "daughters' week". Today I am thankful for my daughters, two by birth and one by choice. They enrich my life in so many ways, here are but a few:

Erika, my eldest is an activist. She is an organizer; political/labor is her specialty. She leads with her heart. I love her passion, dedication. She is sensitive, smart, and sassy. Erika s heart breaks if she thinks she has let anyone down. Everyone loves her! Her beauty radiates from deep inside her and everyone she meets think she is interesting. Travel is her favorite thing to do and she does it as often as she can. She has seen a lot of the world and wants to see 7 continents in 7 years. My money is on her to do it!

My Briana is the baby. She is living here in the Villages with her grandmother, Mu. Mu has Alzheimer’s disease and Bri has put her life on hold to care for her. She is strong and driven, focused and smart. She is studying to become a nurse, and will be a great one. Her heart is as big as the great outdoors. Briana’s emotions run deep. She is generous to a fault and would give away her last dime. She is tenacious and I believe that she can do anything that she puts her mind to.

Stephanie is here in Florida living with Bri and Mu. She is a welder, and looking for work right now. She is an artist, but does not like that label. Steph is filled with wonder; she absorbs things in her environment like a child. I love to see the way she appreciates new experiences. She works hard and plays hard too. Stephanie has the patience to achieve perfection and is going to be very successful, everyone knows this but her. She lights up our lives. Stephanie is on loan to me. Thanks Loraine, you & Ron gave the world (and me) a precious gift!

A Heavy Heart reminds us to be Grateful

2010-10-22T12:31:00.000-07:00

I am writing today with a heavy heart. I started this entry yesterday, in an entirely different state of mind. Our good friends Harry and Fran came to The Villages for a Lifestyle tour last week. They had a great time and it thrilled us to find out that they bought a lot and picked out a model home that they planned on building when their home in South Carolina sold. All of that changed last night when Harry passed away after suffering a stroke. Our hearts are breaking for Fran and their kids and grand kids. He will be missed.

I take this moment of grief to be thankful for every day that I am given to enjoy everyone that I am lucky enough to have in my life. You all know who you are. Carpe’ Diem. This one’s for you Harry!

Happy Birthday Opry Land!

2010-10-21T09:38:00.000-07:00

Our trip back North reminded me why I moved to Florida in the first place. We arrived on a Monday and it was gray, cold and rainy…Tuesday, the same, Wednesday…the same. By Thursday I was ready to poke my eyes out with sticks. Our cottage is on a beautiful little lake, with a wood stove as its only heat source. I bought two electric heaters, a hooded sweatshirt, a pair of jeans, a trunk full of wood, socks, a lap blanket and enough comfort food to support a hibernating bear.

My fragile traveling companion, RC caught a cold, and we couldn’t wait until our business up North was done. We ate our way through our favorite WNY foods and I have to admit that we did see the sun for a day before we packed up and headed south. The leaves were just short of peak and the trip through the Blue Ridge Mountains was special.

We decided to take a side trip to Nashville and got a real treat when we arrived. Nashville has been recovering from severe flooding that closed down their famous Country Music landmark, Opryland. Its cornerstone attraction, the famous Grand Old Opry, had just reopened and was celebrating 85 years of Music. The sign outside announced Taylor Swift and Dolly Pardon as featured guests the night we arrived. We rolled in to the Hotel at 6:30, and by 7:30 we decided to take a ride over to The Opry on a whim, although it was sold out.

I shamelessly used my handicap sticker to con my way to parking right up front and although the show had started, I headed to the ticket office. I am famous for my good timing and just by chance two tickets became available on the floor and just like that we were sitting within shouting range to some of the most famous acts in Country music. I am not the biggest country fan (RC is), but this was amazing. The venue is wonderful, and the performers were great. It was a night I’ll never forget. RC even took a few pictures that didn’t cut off Dolly’s head if you get my drift.

We ended the night downtown Nashville on a Saturday Night. The streets were alive, and the music blasted out of every door. We decided to take the voyeurs route and found a table on the deck of Crabby Joe’s, and watched the street madness from above. There was a time that I would have been right in the thick of the crowd, but that night after a 11 hour drive, and the Concert I was ready to watch the mêlée’ while enjoying a quiet cocktail and some fresh seafood.

The next morning we decided to try a breakfast joint that had been featured on the Food Network, Loveland’s. That wound up not being the best idea. The place looked intriguing, with a cluster of small shops and a Motel straight out of the 50’s. The wait for breakfast, however, was two hours, so we opted for fast food breakfast in a bag and pointed the car toward the Bubble; Villages here we come.

Fall, my favorite time of year!

2010-10-20T12:42:00.000-07:00

Wow! I can not believe its October! The summer was a blur. Dad insisted on going back to NY, and as I predicted, fell and broke his hip. He is in a nursing home, on a slow and shaky recovery. At 90 his chances of a full recovery are not good, but we sent sister #1 up to ask him where he wanted to be buried and his hunger strike was over. He is now starting to co-operate with his physical therapists and put 14 lbs of the 40 he lost back on. The news that his insurance company feels his progress is too slow and he now will be paying $260 per day out of his pocket for his “resort” stay has brought his motivation back!

We feared he wouldn’t make it and took mom up for a visit. Luckily we took a picture of the two of them together in the hospital, as she has no other memory of the visit. Her Alzheimer’s gets her stuck in her “bad dreams” and she flips between thinking that Dad died or that he is divorcing her. I wish the good thoughts could dominate her dreams, but she is sad that he is not with her. I hope he recovers to the point that he can come back here for her sake. When she gets down in the dumps about him, I tell her; when he’s here he makes you mad; when he’s gone he makes you sad. Go figure.

The summer here was record HOT! We had days on end of 98, 99, and 100+ degrees. I love the heat but this year the unending inferno had me missing the smell and snap of apples, the colorful leaves, and crisp cooler weather of fall in the North Country. We took a car trip to support my Erika and my Union, and to protest the lack of good paying jobs in DC on October 2nd. We took that opportunity to get back to WNY. Half way home, we got off the highway to get gas in Pennsylvania, and found Gettysburg by accident. What an interesting place. The history runs deep and monuments and historical sights are everywhere throughout the surrounding area. We followed signs along the road (fresh eggs from happy chickens!) and found a quirky roadside stand run by a hippy couple. The fruit was fresh, the cider delicious and the pottery beautiful. They were out of fresh eggs, but the stop was well worth the detour. I’d like to deliberately visit this area in the future.

Winter departs/Summer Arrives: Recap

2010-05-08T21:29:00.000-07:00

Time passes at a pace that astounds me, Summer is here already, and I love the heat! People ask if it is too hot here in Florida in the summer and the only response is: Hell yeah it’s HOT! You want cool Summers; try Alaska.

Mom is doing so much better. She healed quickly from her skin cancer surgery and we finally have her meds under control. Thank god for her VA doctor, who recognized her need for a different type of drug and her mood has improved 1000 per cent. She is enjoying life and getting around much better. She is no longer sad, and her dizzy spells have all but disappeared.

I have told my kids that if they ever see me slipping into that dark place to up my meds until I start to drool, and then back them off just a little. I see no reason to avoid medication that improves quality of life. Why extend life then not allow us the help needed to enjoy that gift. I say: Bring on the Pharmaceuticals/ Better living through chemicals! It’s funny that was a slogan that also appealed to me many years ago.

We have still been busy having fun here this Winter. We saw many concerts including Paul McCartney & Jimmy Buffet (with a parrot on my head), went to Disney numerous times, and happily entertained throngs of visitors (you all know who you are). We traveled to several sporting events,went to the Keys, and to St Augustine, baked on the sunny beaches, and attended Lockport days. The weather was as cold here as anyone remembers, but the guys never missed an opportunity to play golf. Bike week in Daytona was rainy but the report came back that those in attendance “made the best of it”, and stayed inside, if you get my drift.

The girls (Erika, Briana & Stephanie) got certified to scuba dive, and swam with the Manatees. Briana did very well in school, Erika has several exciting opportunities ahead of her and my artist/welder Steph is going down a path that I am sure will bring her great things.

We have just entered the Month of Birthdays for my posse’. We had many great parties over the winter but May/June brings so many my liver hurts just thinking about it. It began with RC’s, followed by Mark, Yours truly, Joe, Molly, Ricky & Ron all within that short span of time Ouch!

Sadly: I’m starting a JOB Monday working on the Census. My lady of leisure lifestyle is going to be interrupted for a few weeks. Do not fear it is a short time assignment and I will soon return to my self absorbed, hedonistic lifestyle with a little extra ching in my pockets to fund future adventures.

Whew: All in all things are going great, and we are still living the good life!

Sir Paul

2010-04-06T09:38:00.001-07:00

We just got back from a great weekend in South Florida. Paul McCartney concert was beyond description! The guy is an icon, and in his late 60’s ROCKED the place. He played a nice mix of old Beatles, New McCartney, and Wings. He did a nice tribute to John and George and was worth every cent we paid to sit 30 rows away from a Legend. We saw him take off in his Helicopter. This by far was the best concert I have ever attended!

Easter Sunday we got a chance to see some of my favorite family. We drove to Marathon Key and had Easter dinner with Uncle Ron, Aunt Jonnie, Lori B and friends. It felt like going home and I realize how much I miss them as soon as I see them! I need to make a better effort to get down there more often.

Wayne had to stay home to watch Mom. She had a spot of cancer removed from her nose and looks like a bruised boxer. She is sad some days, and the disease plays evil tricks with her mind. The bad tapes play over and over and she gets scared and confused. I wish that I could replace them with good “dreams”. I am trying a strategy of writing good thoughts on the dry erase board in the kitchen. I told her when she gets sad to check the board and think about what we wrote on it. We started with “You are surrounded by people that love you.” the first day and “The sun is shinning” on the second day. The third day it read “Give a hug to everyone that walks through these doors”. It helps a little, but she forgets to look at the board and then slips back into sadness for a while.

It seems that the busier we keep her, the better she is. We took her to the Tiki bar for Cheeseburger in paradise last night and solitaire on the computer keeps her mind active. Bri is her constant companion and has so much patience with her it is amazing. She has some trouble coping when “Evil Grandmu “emerges, but somehow always finds a way to help her get through it.

Erika is going home tomorrow and Stephanie has found a metal artist to mentor her and is settling in nicely. It sure does take a village, I am glad that we have one.

Calm, Sweet Calm

2010-03-21T17:05:00.000-07:00

We have visitors this week. My niece Stephanie and her friend Jessie are here. Steph is staying for a few months to intern with an artist/metalworker in Leesburg. He has agreed to teach her a trick or two in exchange for some help with his work. She brought her cats and they are having a ball here. They are inside cats and we have an enclosed lanai that they think is outside. The girls are going out in the evenings and staying up way later than we are used to; look out Margareta ville!

Jessie is only here for a week but I think she likes it here because she is pitching the virtues of TV to her grand parents. We got them a sales package, and you know how we feel; the more the merrier!

We have had some fun with RC’s mom. We took her to St Augustine, and to the Golf Hall of Fame. The next field trip is to Miami to see Paul McCartney. I can’t wait. It is one of the things that Erika and I have both put on our Bucket lists is to see a Beatle!

Burt has gone back up North and calm has been restored. I hate to speak badly about him so I will only say I am glad his disruptive behavior will be inflicted elsewhere. Mom is more settled when he is gone. When he’s here he makes her mad, and when he’s gone he makes her sad. I’ll take sad for the time being! I think we have a good handle on her medicines, finally, but as is often the case for the octogenarians, something else complicates the Health landscape. The Doctor found cancer on her nose. We are having the spot removed at the end of the month, and look forward to her physical health continuing to improve.

Her mental health seems to stay about the same. Some days are better than others. She enjoys the warm weather and the kids and cats running around. She likes to be pampered a little like getting her nails done, and loves to shop. When the dark days come she has “dreams” that taunt her and she will often get stuck on a subject that makes her very sad. She is at the point in the disease where she realizes her memory is going, but is not ready to accept the extent to which loosing ground. Alzheimer’s disease is a cruel thief. I hope we are giving her more good days here in TV than she would have had up North.

Solstice

2010-02-22T09:59:00.000-08:00

This weekend we celebrated the return of the Sun. I now know what the Pagans felt like! Elaine, Bri and I had lunch outside at a rustic little place on the water and went to Lake Ridge Winery for a Music and craft festival and winery tour. Florida produces a nice array of wines and I found a few that I really liked.

Lake Ridge winery is right on rt 27, only a few minutes from TV, but I had never found the time to visit. It is worth the trip and has events of some sort every month. Next month is Wine and Seafood, sounds delish! For more info check out their website: http://www.lakeridgewinery.com/aboutus-events.php

Our trip to Southern Florida was nice. RC and his mom, Ann and I ventured out of the bubble for two days. The weather was a bit more Florida-like, and we got the opportunity to see the Seminole museum, had some luck at the casino and drove to Key Largo for lunch. Whew…..it is tough keeping up with those octogenarians.

Happy President's Day!

2010-02-15T08:16:00.000-08:00

"All that serves labor serves the nation. All that harms is treason. If a man tells you he trusts America, yet fears labor, he is a fool. There is no America without labor, and to fleece the one is to rob the other." --* Abraham Lincoln

It has been very un-Florida-like cold this winter. They say it’s ElNino, I say its BS. My only consolation is that this week all 50 states have reported snow on the ground. Hawaii even reported snow on a Mountain top. My grass is brown(er) and half of my plants are dead. The good news is that it will again be in the 70’s by the weekend.

Despite the chilly weather, we went to an outdoor concert at Silver Springs Saturday, and saw the band America, who by the way, are natives of England. They rocked the house. Foreigner was two weeks earlier, and was probably in the top two bands that we have seen at Silver Springs.

I f you have not gotten your season pass to this “Old Florida” nature park you are missing out on the biggest entertainment bargain around. For the cost of less than one day at the big theme parks, all of the concerts and unlimited admittance to this quaint park are included. Starship and Loverboy are the next two rock shows on the calendar, with Neal McCoy, Aaron Tippin, and Randy Travis in between for you Country fans.

Briana is doing well in school and Erika has conflict of the best kind as she juggles multiple employment opportunities. She is still torn between politics and teaching. The daily drama continues between Grandpu and the rest of the family. We have to keep our sights on the task of keeping Grandmu safe and healthy and ignore his thoughtless behavior.

Who stole my perfect life?

2010-02-08T16:08:00.000-08:00

It has been a stressful couple of months since Grand-pu has arrived. He has disrupted our rhythm, needles and agitates Grand-mu, Wayne and Bri constantly. He has made a difficult situation impossible with his insensitivity to everyone. He is demanding ungrateful, stingy, judgmental, rude and self absorbed, and those are his good qualities. He had reconstructive knee surgery (at 90) and the focus has been taken off our original task of helping Grand mu get well. We all want to help him but he makes it VERY difficult.

I am hanging on because he is only here for a few more weeks, but I do not do well living with all of this negativity and drama. I can not wait until the offending family members head back up North. I want my life back!

There, I feel better, no more complaining. Breathe………

Good news! Our dear friends Harry and Fran are considering retirement to TV, and we are psyched! They are perfect candidates for this place. Can't wait to see them!

Whew, it’s over!

2009-12-27T13:08:00.000-08:00

Molly hosted our Christmas Eve white Elephant/ Ugly Holiday Apparel party. As usual she put out a great spread and the gift exchange was a hoot. Our caravan of 8 carts (that’s the beginning count) rode around the Villages wrapped in blankets last night looking at the Holiday displays and are looking forward to our New Years celebration. Beth’s brother Bob is here as well as Ron’s sister and friend. RC has his mother, Grand daughter and friend Al, all in residence this year. Wow!

The in-laws continue to improve. Dad is up and getting around in a walker. He is a bit better each day. Elaine’s whole clan is in, complete with 6 adults, 2 kids and three dogs. Dad is going out tonight for dinner at the newest of the clan to move to TV full time, Tom and Monica’s house for dinner. This is the first time since his knee surgery that he has ventured out, and I am sure he is getting a bit stir crazy. We got a very beautiful Christmas arraignment (and an Edible one for the Folks) from Gary and Carrie and Kelley. It reminds us that we miss them and hope they will be down for a visit soon.

Both of my girls being here for the holidays is a nice treat for me. They are seldom both in the same state let alone under the same roof. It has been nice to see them play WII and laugh and fight and enjoy each other’s company this year. We’ve had a lot of quiet down time together just playing cards, talking, and enjoying each other’s company. I know that may seem boring but it is a luxury that we did not often allow in our hectic lives.

We’ve survived another Christmas. This year has been a blur. I usually enjoy the holidays, but if the truth be known this cold that has settled into my chest has made me less than festive. I am going through the motions, but my heart is not quite in it. I’ll be better soon.

2010, Look out!

Merry Christmas!

2009-12-18T09:02:00.000-08:00

Another calendar to discard! Wow this year ripped by. I am taking this opportunity to apologize for no holiday cards this year. This will be my only indulgence to communicate my happy holidays to my friends and relatives! It hasn’t been since the girls were babies that I was too busy to sit down and write out my holiday cards. Both of my daughters are here this year helping out with the grandparents, and that is one of the best parts of this ordeal. Bri is living here and is Grandmu’s caregiver, and Erika is between political assignments and helping with the overflow now that grandpa also needs full time care.

This year my time has been filled with the care and feeding of my in-laws. A quick update (as I have not found the time to blog regularly): Moms recovery from the broken arms is going well, and she has adjusted well to her new home here in TV. Her Alzheimer’s seems a bit worse and each day is a new adventure with her. She has mixed emotions about Dad being here. She misses him terribly when he is out of sight, but he annoys her when he is here. I think that is what marriage eventually comes to.

Burt, my 90 year old father-in-law reluctantly arrived here in Florida a few weeks ago. He decided to have the full knee replacement that he has been putting off for 10 years since his first knee replacement. He found a surgeon that he was comfortable with and last week he had it done. He is a healthy 90 and we are hopeful that he will be able to get around unassisted again. He told the Doctor that his mother lived past 100 and he planned to live to 105. That means the new knee needs to last for at least 15 years. What an optimist! There have been a few complications after his surgery, and it is becoming obvious that he will not be escaping back up north by the first of the year, but our goal is to have him ready to ship off by the beginning of April.

Their convalescence has complicated our formerly narcissistic lives considerably. Between doctor appointments and nurse visits, Physical therapy, trips to the drug store, cooking meals for 6, personal hygiene for both and all the other running for their needs, it has taken almost all free time from four of us. I have resolved to keep some fun in the schedule and the girls and I snuck off to see the manatees on the gulf coast yesterday. It was a nice day and I think we’ll try the Orlando theme parks next week.

I am grateful to be able to help them get as many more good years as possible. Erika commented that she was learning a lot about how to be a responsible member of a family unit. That is good news as we will be in this situation too, someday. Good Karma all around for us. I have new respect for caregivers. It is a full time commitment.

Happy Holidays and Peace in the New Year!

A quiet revolution

2009-11-29T11:19:00.000-08:00

Boy do the months get by! I cannot believe that we have celebrated our 3rd Thanksgiving here in TV. Our table grows a little bigger each year. This year we had 18 for dinner. The generational split was interesting to me. We had 5-20 somthings, 4 over 85, and 9 of us boomers. No little ones! I don’t know exactly what this all means; I’m just making an observation. As usual we had too much food and will exist on leftovers until we cannot stand anymore. The featured drink of the day was White Russians. We missed Beth and Ron this year, but welcomed Ricky and Debbie and her family.

We adopted a cat for Burt and Carol. They miss the barn cats that he fed at the back door every morning up North. He would have a fit if he knew that Sambo cost $85. Cats were routinely dropped off at the farm, and took up the job as mouse catchers for free. He asked Bri if the cat needed to be walked twice a day. We are really surprised at how narrow his knowledge of the world is for being a resident on the planet for 90 years. Some of the things he just doesn’t seem to grasp are a result of his age, but sometimes it is due to the communication limitations that his generation has experienced.

Communication and the media are things that are viewed very differently across generations. I think that we have not yet come to grasp the seminal change, or paradigm switch, in communication that the internet has immersed us in without us noticing. I see this change as pretty exciting and scary at the same time. It still amazes me that anything that you need to know can be found on the internet if you have the will and the patience to search.

The information available on the internet in incredible and has made research, and information validation as we knew it a thing of the past. The twenty-something’s and down, know that what is reported is to be viewed with a skeptical eye. Because anyone can now publish unconfirmed information, sources can be vague or unsubstantiated, and information need not be corroborated or validated. Wikepedia is an on line encyclopedia that virtually anyone can update. The responsibility to get the truth is now up to the seeker, not the provider. That alone is monumental.

The invention of the printing press was obviously one of those moments that changed everything we knew about communication, but the invasion of the internet, and tabloid news into our homes has been a little more insidious. I am still trying to wrap my head around this, without turning into a Ted Kiminski (uni-bomber), but it scares me to realize that there are at least two generations of people out there that believe everything they read is confirmed, validated truth. The opportunity to promote propaganda and spread lies is an incredibly important outcome that has yet to be fully examined. I am watching this happen with the health care reform debate. The insurance companies are preying on the fear of seniors, and scaring them with misinformation to protect their obscene profits generated by the current system. This is only one small example.

Stay tuned as this hypothesis (manifesto?) of mine on the quiet revolution takes shape.

Big Bad Burt, or Grand-Pu has arrived

2009-11-18T12:34:00.000-08:00

My mother-in-law Carol is glad to see Burt, her partner of 60 plus years, and his being here has relieved her worries that she did something wrong and she was being punished for it. They have a marriage from the ancient past and sometimes it is hard for us from the next generations to watch.

He is frustrated that she can’t remember which way to turn to get to their bedroom, and that she tells the same stories over and over. What we find the hardest to watch is how much he pushes for her to wait on him like a servant, and to do the household chores that she has done in the past. He says she has fun doing chores; I say have some fun yourself and get up off your butt and get your own coffee. After she almost started the coffeemaker on fire, folded and put Bri’s clothes in the wrong dresser and cried because he yelled at her for the unmade bed, we had a “talk”.

We tried to explain to him that she will never be like she was before she got Alzheimer’s, and we cannot, for safety reasons, let her use any appliances. No she will not iron your clothes because here in Florida we throw out clothing that needs to be ironed! We asked him if it would be fair for us to get mad at him for moving at a snails pace due to his bad knees, or to get frustrated when he cannot hear us because his hearing is going bad. Same concept, rounding the corner towards 100 has its obvious pitfalls, but we are all going to approach this time in their lives with compassion and patience, if it kills us!

We have asked him to gently direct her to the right bedroom, without judgment, and to allow us to manage the bulk of the household chores. He is trying, but old habits die hard. I have to remind myself that the dynamics of their relationship have emerged over nearly three quarters of a century and their interactions and the bickering are something they both contribute to, although she is no longer as able to keep up her end of the banter. I am sure that my relationship with his son was just as questionable to him throughout the years. He never understood why Wayne changed diapers, washed clothes, and got his own coffee.

Briana is a saint with them, but has to be talked of the ledge about once a day. I try to help her see a point of view that is often hard for me to see. She handles them both like a pro, and I am very proud of her.

Next chapter: He wants to go back up North after Thanks giving. Stay tuned as a 90 year old man with bad knees, tries to convince me why he has to go back and fight the snow in Western NY.

My Best Dog Friend is sick

2009-10-30T20:43:00.001-07:00

Lady McBeth is my ten year old lab. She started failing last week and I thought for sure we would have to put her down. She couldn’t get up by herself and she was getting weaker by the day. We took her to the vet expecting the worst, but found out that she was diabetic, and very dehydrated. I cried for 3 days straight hoping that she would get better one more time and she is sure trying to oblige me. She spent the last 2 days on IV at the vets and is now on insulin. She seems better, but could use some good thoughts sent to her like Tinkerbell got in Peter Pan.

Carol, or Grandmu to my girls, is settling in nicely in her new home in the Villages. We brought a truck load of her antiques, sewing stuff, and whatever else we thought might make her feel at home and it seems to be helping. She gets a bit confused and has some bad Tapes playing over and over in her head, but she seems to feel better when she talks about what is bothering her. She does not quite remember falling and breaking her arms, and wonders why they hurt sometimes. She had a similar fall many years ago, when the dog brought a skunk into the yard, and she thinks that is what happened recently. She also misses grandpa and forgets that he is coming down next week.

The bright side is that every day she amazes us. It has only been 6 weeks since her fall and she is doing just about everything for herself that she did before the accident. She has better card skills than most of us, and beats her opponents soundly at Euchre nightly, even if she forgets mid-game and starts playing a similar game (bid/pitch). She still remembers more about sewing than most of us will ever know. She is helping us make our Halloween costumes, and is going to Molly’s party with us Tomorrow night. She asked me if anyone there will know her, because if not she could just go as herself and no one would recognize her. Her sense of humor is sharp as a tack!

She is ready to go anywhere, anytime. She went out to lunch with us at Katie Bells this afternoon, and to Oktoberfest in the Square this evening. She was pretty tired when she got home but so was everyone else. I hope I can come close to keeping up that pace long into my eighties.

Elaine is here for three weeks, to help her settle in and Briana is her constant companion. It is a full time job for the four of us, but I can see her getting less anxious everyday. I am glad to be able to help her with her best chance for many more years of fun in the sun!

Welcome Mu!

2009-10-20T07:33:00.001-07:00

My mother in law is arriving today. At 87 years old, 5 week her recovery from a fall breaking both of her arms just below the shoulder has been nothing short of miraculous! She is such a trooper. The day after the accident she was taking only Tylenol for the pain and not complaining one bit. She continues to amaze us all.

The topic of this blog is going to change a bit. I am hoping to chronicle the joys and pains of helping an aging parent, with many challenges. We are beginning a life phase that many others of our generation find themselves in. We are taking this new situation on filled with optimism, but tempered with realism. We know that some days will be better than others for Mom. She is facing big changes, some good some not so good. We hope this course we are on will allow her to have many more years of good life here in the sunshine.

I welcome anyone else who is or has been in this situation to share your stories and advice with us.

Hijacked

2009-09-28T20:09:00.001-07:00

Sometimes I feel so in control of my life, and other times it is like I am being swooped away in a downstream current. I am swooping right now. I stole away and was happily retired in happy land, when my life caught up with me. Don’t get me wrong, I am not opposed to change or to meeting my obligations, but… wow! It just goes to show; just when you think east is the best direction, north comes calling. I am OK with the direction that we are headed in, but it sure is not the planned route.

Mom’s recovery is going well. She has an unbelievably strong will, and is determined to get better. For 87 years old, she continues to amaze us all. I am not kidding myself, Briana is going to have her hands full, but she seems ready to take on the responsibility of Mu’s recuperation and care for a while.

They call us the sandwich generation, because just as we think we are done raising our family, the previous generation needs our help. This economy further complicates things as many of our kids are returning to the nest. I just heard on the news tonight that the 19-25 year unemployment rate is over 17 percent.

I hope for the best, and will deal with the rest!

The Golden years…right?

2009-09-16T12:41:00.000-07:00

Well our worst fears for Wayne’s mom came true last week. A few days before their 62nd wedding anniversary she fell and broke both arms below the shoulder, bumped her head and skinned her knees. The good news/bad news thing about reaching the octogenarian decade is: Good news, you made it! Bad news is inevitably crappy stuff begins to happen. We start forgetting things, we can’t physically do some of things we used to enjoy, we spend too much time at the Doctor’s office, and our reflexes and balance are not what they used to be.

Dad is going to be 90 this year and he has been doing his best to take care of mom up to this point. Her rehabilitation from this accident, however, will defiantly be beyond his ability. So….. thanks to the generosity of Elaine and her husband and the fortunate timing of my youngest, Bri, being down here and available to help with her care, we are moving them to TV.

Our hope is that her recovery will go smoother without the harsh winter weather to contend with. She and dad will also have the benefit of most of their family nearby for company and support. We are hoping that they can relax and enjoy lots more good years here in the bubble. I know the transition will be difficult for her to understand, and for him to get used to, but we hope we are making a decision that will turn a bad situation, at least for now, into a not so bad one.

Happy Labor day!

2009-09-07T05:11:00.000-07:00

"There is no greater calling than to serve your fellow men. There is no greater contribution than to help the weak. There is no greater satisfaction than to have done it well."
Walter Reuther

Happy Labor Day everyone! God bless the UAW!

My chick has returned to roost….at least for now!

2009-09-02T19:55:00.000-07:00

My youngest, Briana, has returned to the nest to go back to school. She has decided that the health care business is where the future is. I look around TV and can’t fault her logic. We are a population going Grey. We spend more time at the Doctors, than anywhere else lately.

I look around the neighborhood and notice that she is not the only chick back in the coop. RC’s granddaughter is also attending community college for Nursing, three houses to the right another friend has his son camped out on his side porch, and the house four houses to the left also has a kid on a laptop doing homework on the lanai. All of these new Villagers are over 19 of course (refer to our covnent), but the face of this community is changing a bit. This difficult economy has had an unexpected side effect. Families are again extending.

My great-great grandmother had a large house next to the rail road tracks in Tonawanda, NY. It had two apartments upstairs and everyone in the family lived there at one time or another. During the great depression, all of the kids lived there because it was easier to keep them fed and warm under one roof. Grandma cared for all of them while their parents worked at what ever was available while trying to stay out of the poor house. First and second cousins, three and four generations, all under one roof. The stories they all told about living at Grandma Holler’s always made me yearn again for that kind of extended family. They never talked about the hardships, but of the love and fun they shared. They remembered ice skating on Ives pond, and climbing the apple trees. They remembered the hobo’s from the tracks out back, that Grandma would give soup in exchange for work on the fence. Life was measured by how you lived and laughed, not by what you did or had.

My parents generation also found comfort at Grandma’s (now owned by the next generation my great Aunt Margaret). Job losses, illness, death and divorce were some of the reasons we passed through those loving doors. Aunt Margaret welcomed any of us that needed a home, or just an apron covered lap to cry on. We still skated on Ives pond and loved to cross that field to have some of the piping hot chocolate that was always waiting. She’d sit us down and cut our bangs (I have pictures to prove the results of this torture). Colleen, Connie, Susan, Cindy? Sometimes she couldn’t get our names right the first time, but we knew who was getting “hollered at”. She and her sister Rose sold real estate. They dragged us around to the “appointments”, pointing out this house that they could have bought for a song, or that place that went cheep because his wife was running around.

Aunt Margaret died in that house quite a few years ago, and it was sold. I was sad at first that no one in our generation had an interest in the old place, but we were wrapped up in our own lives, and the next thing I knew it was gone.

I have tried to carry on the “open door” tradition in the way our generation has adapted. The first house I bought was a four family that still provides a home for the people I care about. My daughter Erika and nice Stephanie live in the apartments downstairs and I think my nephew Brian is moving in soon. My sister, sister in law, brother in law and a whole flock of friends have lived on “Niagara St.” Later, we made sure our family home had an in-law apartment and when my mother’s health began to fail she moved in and lived there until she died. That apartment became the spring board to independence for my kids, and extended our family to many others during the 20 years we lived there. Our home was the gathering place for all of the neighborhood kids, and where all of the best parties were held.

When we made the difficult decision to sell Tonawanda Creek (the “Ponderosa”) and move to TV, quite a few voices cried foul. They must have felt what I felt when Grandma’s house was sold. The lesson here, however, is that home is wherever the Welcome Mat is. It is not about the bricks and mortar around you but the welcoming arms that bring you into the safe place. I am glad to welcome Briana back to the “safe place”, until she’s ready to fly again.

I know that the circle will eventually come back around. My kids, hopefully have learned to keep their hearts and homes open to those in need, and won’t put me prematurely into a bad smelling nursing home.

Gods Speed Teddy!

2009-08-26T09:06:00.001-07:00

May the road rise up to meet you, May the wind be ever at your back May the sun shine warm upon your face And the rain fall softly on your fields And until we meet again, May God hold you in the hollow of his hand.

Raise a glass to the Lion of the Senate. May his soul rest in Peace. He will be missed.

One word for summer in Florida: HOT!

2009-08-03T20:05:00.000-07:00

I understand the concept of Siesta. Northerners don’t nap. They work right through the afternoon and don’t think twice about it. They (we) harshly judge those with their hats pulled over their eyes and their chair rocked back against the wall in the middle of the work day. I now understand that this kind of unrelenting heat sucks the life out of you unless you pace yourself.

I have been thinking about how I used to work in the plant when the temperature rose to the high 80’s outside, inside near the ovens it was often over 100 degrees. We were supposed to be sent home if the temperature got over 110, but if you were caught with a thermometer on site, you got walked out. Our plant had no air conditioning, but those days of sweltering heat could usually, be counted on one hand, most summers. This summer in Florida has been HOT, day after day. I am not complaining. I still have the luxury of air conditioning and siesta if I choose.

The devilish uncertainty of a career in the auto industry has reared its ugly head again this week. Just when we thought that the worst was behind us, the rug gets pulled out again. General Motors has just emerged from bankruptcy, only to announce that they will not keep their promise to take the retirees back from ailing Delphi. We worked for GM for over 28 of the 30 years of our careers, but still may not receive a pension from GM.

This atmosphere of eminent doom is not new to us. When we were hired, we endured threats that we would not make our 90 days (often GM would lay workers off on their 89th day to avoid paying holiday pay). We then struggled through the years of the oil embargo. I spent my 5th and most of my 6th year on lay off. The spin off of the component divisions to the new Delphi Corporation was unsettling. It was especially hard to watch as the mother corporation squeezed all of the profits out of her orphaned plants, while developing off shore strategies, and duel sources (planned obsolescence). Four years ago our struggling corporation was forced by its parent company into bankruptcy and we all were sent off to an early retirement, with the promise that if we went, GM would take care of the pension obligation.

Last week my benefits were slashed and my pension was taken over by the government. Whoopee! Here we go again.

Walter Cronkite

2009-07-19T17:14:00.000-07:00

"We endanger the democracy by our failure to understand and carry out our responsibility."

Walter Cronkite

You will be missed!

Economic Realities for the Next Generation

2009-07-10T18:41:00.000-07:00

The July 4th week is always a busy one here in TV. Guests, picnics, parades etc. All of the kids flew in. A storm of changes are in the wind for all of them. This economy has brought upheaval to so many peoples lives, and the burden seems especially heavy on the generation that is entering the workforce today. Erika is safely home and rested after her trip, and my youngest is getting ready for a complete change of lifestyle. The cousins (Steph and Brian) also came in to visit and it looks like change is in the cards for them too.

Erika has recently completed her teaching degree. She is going to work on a City council race in NYC for the election season. She cannot find a teaching job here in Florida, (or anywhere else) as there is a moratorium on hiring right now. She sees this as a good thing, for now, as it allows her to follow some long time dreams. She has always wanted to live in NYC and about to do it, and she has been interested in the Peace Corps and is looking into that option. She has a good friend that has taken a job in southern California, and she may get a chance to spend some time with her on the West coast. When you get lemons, make lemonade.

My youngest, Briana has been living in Ohio and driving the big rigs. She has made the difficult decision to leave the job and go back to school. Although the money was good the job was very hard and involved long hours and her health was already beginning to suffer. She was also away from family and friends and that has become too much for her to tolerate. She has a year of college completed in criminal justice but has decided to try the health care profession for a change. She will be moving back in with us and that will be an adjustment for all of us. I look forward to having her here with me but am also aware of the challenges moving an adult child back into her parent’s home will bring.

My Niece, Stephanie is a victim of the auto industry collapse. She worked at the same plant that we are retired from. This plant supported Lockport, a small town in western NY, and employed over 11,000 people when we started in 1976. It is now down to around 1500 employees and her job is gone. She would like to move down here to Florida because she feels like Lockport is dying. Steph has noticed that crime is up and it seems like something new is being boarded up everyday. She has qualified for retraining under the stimulus plan and is going to welding school next month. I worry about where this generation will be if manufacturing does not rebound.

Her brother, Brian, recently landed an entry level job at a bank and has given up his dream of going to St Bonaventure to study Forensic Science. Fortunately, the bank offers an opportunity to go to business school. That is not what he intended to do but in this economy sometimes you have to do the practical thing, and sadly let a dream go for now.

If there was historically an upside to war it was the economic prosperity that followed. In the past, a war time economy was fueled by steel and weapons production, but now those industries are all off shore. We should all be worried about the larger implications of this dependency on tentative relationships with foreign producers (like China). If these relationships sour, where will we turn? Remember Rosie the Riveter? Where will she work?

Back Over the Atlantic

2009-06-13T12:28:00.000-07:00

One of my favorite parts of traveling is reflection of the trip. The plane trip home was grueling, but it allows time for reflection. European life is very different in many ways. The sights were awesome, and the history mind blowing. The depths of the roots that define the culture make me feel like a newborn transient. I was amazed by the churches that were built before the birth of Christ. The casual manner that the guides commented on buildings and parks that were designed thousands of years ago challenged my perspective of time and space. You see, in my world nothing is more than a few decades old, even our most historic places go back only a couple of hundred years.

The best way to appreciate what you have is to leave it for a bit. As much as I enjoy travel it only serves to prove how conveniently we live here in TV. My whole life is set up for me. Selfish as that sounds it is nice to return to a lifestyle that is extremely easy. We Americans love conveniences. The simple things that I enjoy taking for granted were difficult to come by over seas. Cold water or iced drinks of any kind were simply unavailable. Affordable shopping for everything in one store is a concept that is absent. Public bathrooms were not available or you had to pay to use a unisex hole in the floor on a very busy street corner. I found myself descending narrow winding staircases in restaurants, into centuries old stone basements to find tiny storage rooms that doubled for WC’s (water closets).

If you can imagine, no golf carts! Everyone walked. Parking would have been impossible so we relied on trains, buses, and taxis. Public transportation was confusing and expensive.

I enjoyed the leisurely way people lingered in cafés for hours. It is a luxury that we Americans seldom allow ourselves. A cup of espresso or a glass of wine could buy you a choice viewing spot for literally hours of conversation and people watching. Drinking, smoking and judging passersby’s was Erika’s take on the past time. I read somewhere the average time for a meal in France is 1 hour and 20 minutes: that same meal in the US averaged 11 minutes.

Erika will continue the journey on her own. She is a big history aficionado (geek), and will go on to visit Switzerland, Germany, Amsterdam and England. I envy her courage to travel to such unfamiliar places alone, but will breathe a sigh of relief when she touches down at Orlando International. She reminds me often that she is a “big girl”, but I still find it hard to let the birdies fly on their own.

2009-06-02T13:56:00.001-07:00

Paris

Last leg of the trip. We have been finishing the Paris attractions; Erika pouted all through France the last time we were here because she didn’t see the Mona Lisa. We should not judge her too harshly as she was only 12 years old. We visited the Louve this trip and she no longer has reason to pout. We sat in Cafes and drank Champagne and judged the people on the street. This seems to be a sport second only to Football (Soccer).

We traveled to Versailles today and it was too much walking for me. We are packing and on our way back to the bubble. It has been a great trip; my only regret is that I didn’t get to see Claudia and her family. I relentlessly tried right up until today with no success. It is much harder to get around here than I thought it would be.

Canes, France

2009-05-31T05:41:00.001-07:00

We are back in France for the last stop at Canes. The famous film festival has just ended. The French Rivera is beautiful and much cleaner than the stops in Italy. Monte Carlo was also this stop but the ship left Port at 3PM, and we got a late start (cause we’re late night people now).

We stopped for lunch at a street side café’ called the melting pot. I thought I’d try a French dish called pasta and sausage. It turned out to plain spaghetti (no sauce), and two hot dogs. I got thinking about the starving guys back home. We sort of, had the same thing as you yesterday, ravioli, ours with goat cheese and a nice cream sauce and yours out of a can and prepared by Chef Boyardee. I’ll be home soon.

This is our last night on the Ship. We are going to Paris for three nights and then back home.

Livorno

2009-05-31T05:38:00.001-07:00

This is the stop for Florence and Pisa. Erika took a bus to Pisa and Elaine went into Livorno to shop. This small costal city had good bargain shopping and Gelato to die for.

Free style cruising is true if by that you mean that nothing is free. We are feeling “Nickel and dimed” by the NCL line, every time you turn around there is an up charge. This is turning an affordable vacation into a costly one.

I had a talk with myself to not let that ruin our good time so today we are doing our best to get some of it back, by doing everything offered onboard. We talked the cruise director into buying our dinner at the Specialty Restaurant of our choice (we were sworn to secrecy on this so don’t tell), ate four times, smuggled a bottle of Vodka into the Ship, saw two shows, one by an international star (loved by millions), played the Quest game, and brought a spa robe back to the room. So there!

Rome

2009-05-31T05:25:00.000-07:00

I stayed at the Spa all day, and had the place to myself. Erika and Elaine went into Rome “on their own”. The cruise ship excursions are expensive but they allow you to cut through long lines to see the sights. They covered a lot of ground but it only served to wet Erika’s interest in going back for a better look. They teamed up with a nice couple from Pennsylvania, and only got ripped off by one cabbie.

The entertainment on the ship has been first class. The magician tonight was Vegas caliber, and the Second City Touring Company was a hoot. We have seen a variety of great dancers and musicians to suit any taste. From string quartets to marimba phone players, one was better than the next.

Napoli

2009-05-31T05:17:00.000-07:00

Naploi

We visited Naples today. The city is densely populated and chaotic. It sits at the base of Mt Vesuvius, and the views of the Seacoast are breathtaking. The tour bus company was unorganized and frustrating, and the first bus route that we took sat mostly in uptown traffic and smelled of smog. The second loop, however, took us on a trip with views I will always remember.

We are having a great time onboard. I gambled a bit and made a deal with Erika that she could have the $100 dollar bill or let me take it into the casino and she could keep whatever I won. She chose the casino, and came away with a cool $180. We are all pretty amazed at the late nights we are keeping. We found an acoustic guitar player doing a Beatles night at the Star Bar and stayed out until nearly midnight. Wow! Erika has so far resisted our suggestions that she attend the single functions on the ship, and she seems totally unaware of how the beautiful Italian men are enamored by her.

The weather is perfect, and the Internet still is terrible. Over half done with our trip, see you all soon! On to Rome.

It's my birthday and I'll cruise if I want to

2009-05-27T15:20:00.000-07:00

I woke to the rocky shores of Malta as the view from my balcony. The only thing that I know about this beautiful, ancient Italian island is that I think food network star Mario is from here. I feel so ignorant and isolated as an American, it is almost embarrassing that everyone around the world knows so much about us, and we know so little about other countries or cultures.

We have had some trouble communicating while at sea. It seems odd not to have any contact (phones and internet have been impossible) and time seems irrelevant. We can’t figure out what time zone we are in and the displays on our phones all have different times. Oh well, I guess we don’t need to know exactly what time it is.

The styles here are very European (go figure). The women all wear scarves, tied perfectly (we all bought one and will probably never wear them again), and the men all wear man-capris, and Speedos (just for you Beth & Molly).

Cruisin'

2009-05-25T09:07:00.000-07:00

This post is a surprise from Erika. Mom wrote this, but I've been complaining and reluctant to help with matters of the Internet, as it is slow, it is expensive, and i am a selfish kid...anyway mom wrote this, it rocks and you should comment on it! Happy birthday tomorrow Mama!

We are on the NCL Gem heading to Malta. I am not great with Geography, so I was very surprised to see that we would be closer to Africa, than to Italy on our way to Malta. The ship is a giant grazing station, with continuous food stations to please any palate. We had breakfast delivered to our cabin, just in case we were too weak (from several hours without nourishment) to make it to the breakfast buffet.

Vacations for the Lenhart’s always included at least one health emergency, usually suffered by poor Briana. Bri fell off a bike in Disney, got food poisoning in Yellowstone, Sea sick in Key West, a sty in her eye in Paris. Erika has taken over her job on this trip. She has been bitten by invisible bugs on her legs, and has welts that we are referring to as Ebola-like. She doesn’t think this is very funny.

We have a balcony in our cabin and can watch the sea go by. It makes the tiny cabin “suite” seem bigger and brighter. I have decided not to buy the expensive shore excursions, but am splurging on the spa package on the ship. For a price we are allowed unlimited access to this cool spa on the bow of the ship. It has saunas, hot tubs, heated stone lounges etc. all geared to pamper. E &E are going horseback riding in Malta tomorrow.

2009-05-23T14:05:00.000-07:00

Hey from Spain, I think it's rude that we gave Espana a nick name (Spain). What if they called us Estados Unidos. Oh never mind, they do. But seriously if the name of the country is Espana, why not call it Espana?*

Barcelona is a beautiful port city. The architecture is varied and diverse, making it very apparent that the city has been occupied by many cultures throughout history. These European cities have evidence of thousands of years of history, and are in sharp contrast to our US cities that are only a couple of centuries old.

Elaine finally caught up with us here. She missed the whole first leg of the trip as Continental flight from Rochester was delayed and she could not make the connection to Paris. We took one of those touristy double Decker bus tours and are now about to get the drink-o-the day at the hotel bar.

Cruising the Med tomorrow. If I can't get the pictures up here check out Erika's facebook.

*This gem of profound insight evolved from a conversation that I had with Erika, all rights are reserved.

2009-05-22T01:42:00.001-07:00

Gay Paris'

2009-05-22T01:12:00.000-07:00

We are in Paris today. The city of lights is magnificant! After the marathon flight, I have no idea what time or day it is. We took the the subway to dinner at Saint Michelle, and Notre Dame. Erika has me a bit worried about leaving her alone here in Europe, as she is very friendly, polite and niave. Several stangers approached her and tried to get her to accompany them to (reference the movie Taken) their place, and she politely responded "No thank you, you are making my mother nervous. Yikes!

Pictures are available on Erika's site, as I have not yet mastered the art of posting photo's. http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=2043747&id=47001341

Off We Go!

2009-05-20T04:11:00.001-07:00

It’s finally here! We leave for our European adventure tomorrow. I am cautiously venturing out of the TV bubble. I have mixed emotions. I am going to try to do a travel diary, maybe even learn how to “tweet”. A marathon flight gets us to Paris by way of Chicago, Newark, then across the ocean. We have a whirl wind trip planned complete with a Cruise of the Western Mediterranean, I think I should have added a few more days as I may not get to see my dear daughter/friend Claudia, and that will make me beyond sad.

I have been packing, and re-packing trying to guess what the weather will be. The internet says 60’s and it is rainy season. That is the most difficult temperature range to plan for (not too cold but not hot either). I guess I have become too accustomed to my TV daily sunshine. I was watching the rain this afternoon and thinking how rarely we have to endure a whole day of rain like this. The tropical summers usually bring a mid afternoon down pour preceded and followed by blue skies and sunshine. I know we need the rain badly but, I so love to be spoiled by Florida weather.

I will miss you all, friends and neighbors, make sure the boys don’t starve!

Mickey says Happy Birthday RC!

2009-05-09T20:02:00.000-07:00

If you ever want to feel special, spend your birthday at Disney World. I have always loved the place, but this week RC and I spent our “Day-O-fun” at Disney to celebrate his milestone (now eligible for social security) birthday and they know how to treat a birthday boy! You not only get in for free on your special day, but they give you a button notifying everyone of the day of your birth.

From there it only gets better. Every single employee that you encounter all day greets you with a warm smile and a big “happy birthday”. RC has been known to get a bit grumpy on his birthday, but even a party pooper like him couldn’t help but get into the spirit when the Oompa band at the German Restaurant in Epcot sang Happy Birthday, complete with Alpine horn and accordion, to him at lunch.

Happy Birthday RC! Now you can finally let the younger generation support your lazy retiree's butt!

Shamefull Health Care USA

2009-05-01T09:13:00.000-07:00

I hate dwelling on health problems. It’s a shame that as we grow older this topic has to occupy so much of our time. I long for the days that I got up in the morning pain free and went through my day without a single thought of health related issues crossing my mind. That is no longer the case and I am gravely disappointed at the state of care in this country.

Flash back to 1963, Elmwood Park, Tonawanda NY. The neighborhood that I grew up in was nice middle class and both my Doctor and Dentist lived across the street. Dr Britt was a GP, and he and his family lived in a modest 2 story home in our quiet neighborhood, not in a gated Mc Mansion. I had a high fever and at 2AM my mother got concerned enough to call Dr Britt to get some advice. He came over in his PJ’s and gave me a shot of antibiotics and the fever broke in a few hours. This was not special care for the privileged; it was compassionate responsible application of his Hippocratic Oath.

Flash to 1987, Lockport NY, my youngest daughter, 18 months old at the time, was up crying and clutching her right arm to her chest in obvious pain. Thinking she may have broken her clavicle, or dislocated her arm at day care, I called her Dr’s service at 8PM. He returned my call much later and informed me that I should give her a Tylenol and bring her to his office in the morning as my insurance (supposed to be the best around) frowned on the use of the emergency room. He wanted me to put a baby to bed with a possible broken bone because the insurance company didn’t always pay for emergency treatments (not smart to rile the mama bear). I told him that I had plenty of money to go along with my insurance and not to ever make my families medical decisions based on an insurance company policy. Furthermore if he did not wish to meet me at the emergency room, our new pediatrician would. He met me there, put her dislocated elbow back into place and I found a new Doctor the following week. Doctors were by then being paid bonuses by the insurance companies for minimizing care and testing of their patients and insurance guys were now directing medical decisions.

Fast forward to 2009, American Doctors are now the millionaires in our society, well paid with the best educations in the world. Technology has advanced at such warp speed medical care concerns must be all but erased, right? Not so fast! I find myself in a system that ranks 37^th in the industrialized world supported by inadequate expensive insurance plans, staffed by ambivalent Doctors, that treat patients (especially Women over 50) as invisible and expendable. Today one in 8 deaths in our country are a result of medical mistakes. The number one ranked country, France, has a national policy that doctors salaries are capped at $50,000 a year so everyone can afford medical care. Millions of families, mostly the working poor, are uninsured and are unable to get any care at all.

http://www.photius.com/rankings/healthranks.html

I have recently developed a painful and potentially dangerous condition and called my new Florida doctor, only to be told that it would be 3 weeks until he could see me. I went to urgent care and $150 and two hours later I left with an antibiotic (just like in 1963). When that only temporarily helped my condition, I again called my physicians office. I was told that I could see another doctor in the practice (again 3weeks to see my doctor: why wasn’t I offered this option before?). I agreed to come in the next day. I arrived 15 minutes early and waited an hour. As I sat in the exam room I heard the doctor in the hall, pitching a temper tantrum because he had patients scheduled during his lunch time. He blew into the exam room and rushed me through a terse conversation, dismissed my request for a specialist referral and rudely scolded me as I was supposed to be only “quick rash appointment”. I paid full price for the half assed appointment and started looking for a new doctor that afternoon. Medical professional or not this man is my employee and he is fired.

Our system is broken, and I don’t know what the answer is. I don’t want to live in a country where people die because they cannot afford medical care. I don’t want to live in a country where only the rich can afford preventive medical care. I don’t want to live in a country that ranks behind Costa Rica and Dominica for any reason! Maybe we could sample the 36 countries that rank above us in the world and take their best practices and learn from their mistakes. Mr. President, we are waiting, because you promised……

Easter Break

2009-04-19T13:23:00.000-07:00

Easter is the craziest time around TV. Everyone has visitors, and the snow birds are getting in their last hurrahs. The place is a mob scene, and then they are gone. With no warning this place becomes almost serene. As much as I will enjoy the respite, I will miss the excitement the visitors bring.

We had a crowd for Easter Dinner. We set up a feast for 20 outside on RC’s patio and ate and drank until the community watch truck started cruising back and forth down the street. The guys got a bit boisterous playing darts in the dark, and Wayne accused me of stifling him, when I asked him to take it down a few decibels. I guess I thought 11pm was a bit late for that kind of noise level (I can be so strict).

The Thompson clan was in for a visit and they left quite an impression. I am going to try my first attempt at posting photos on my blog with a sure to be classic of Michelle doing the Macarena and Kevin and Molly singing Karaoke at the Tiki Bar. I am not going to mention who, but several of the clan was a bit under the weather for the ride home. They think its easy living our lifestyle. Most stunts are performed by professionals (us), so don’t try this at home.

European Vacation

2009-04-01T20:06:00.000-07:00

I am pleased to announce that it appears my oldest daughter Erika is going to graduate from Niagara University in a few weeks. I say that it “appears” that way because things don’t always go as planned for Erika. Sometimes another idea catches her fancy and she takes a little detour. Regardless, I am, as always, so proud of the person that she has become!

I guess the apple didn’t fall too far from the tree in that regard, as it took me 10 years and three changes of majors to complete my Bachelors degree back in the day. My parents feared that I would become a professional student, but continued to lovingly support my follies. I was going to be a teacher, then Law School beckoned, then Psychology caught my attention……sorry Mom & Dad. I finally went back to the teaching thing with duel major in Psychology (and a bunch of pre-law credits). I then took a detour and went to work in the auto industry and the UAW for 30 years. Life takes such unpredictable turns. Maybe I’ll still do that Law thing when I grow up.

As a graduation present to herself Erika is going to Europe for 2 months this summer. I saw the movie Taken (two girls kidnapped on holiday in Europe) a few weeks ago and it scared the bee-gee-bers out of me. I have now decided that she needs her mother with her for the beginning of the trip. So I talked my ever ready travel companion, Elaine into going too. From there it expanded (as usual) into a potential Chevy Chase like European adventure, stretching from one week into two with a cruise of the Mediterranean thrown in for good measure. Europe here we come! We are soooo excited!

Flat Stanley

2009-03-22T20:16:00.000-07:00

We have decided to make it more palatable to continue doing my “job” we would make Monday, my day off, our day-o-fun, and do a different cool field trip every week. RC’s grand daughter has asked him to help with a school project called Flat Stanley. He is this little laminated guy that is assigned to get his picture taken in as many interesting places as possible. We thought that it would be a good idea for Flat Stanley to along go with us on our weekly adventures.

So far, we have been to the Beach in Daytona, a great Restaurant called the Salt Water Cowboy in St Augustine and to a Yankee’s game in Tampa. We are off to see the Manatees in Homosassa tomorrow.

Some proposed destinations on our list for future trips include the Sterling gambling boat, Siesta Key, the Webster flea market, an air boat ride, the Space Center, and Downtown Disney. We are looking for suggestions on other interesting fun day trips, so if you have been somewhere fun please share your finds with me.

Wayne has been busy with his little hobby business, repairing snaps on cart covers and replacing zippers. He doesn’t know what he is missing. I hope to coax him into taking a day off and joining RC, Stanley and I in the future.

Dear Barack:

2009-03-11T13:27:00.000-07:00

I wrote the President an email today. I have heard that he has his staff pick a few constituent emails for him to read each day to keep him grounded. I doubt that mine will hit his desk but you never can tell. I waited 50 days to give him a chance to settle in.

I asked him not to allow my government to kick us little guys when we are down by taxing and penalizing us for our diminishing retirement savings. I asked him to renew legislative support for our unions and to protect social security. I also asked him to never abandon the next generation’s future, no matter how dire today seems.

I didn’t mention health care, although it is very important to me, as I think everyone else is in his ear about that subject. Unlike the last administration, I feel like someone in the Oval office may be listening to the pulse of this country.

I think my friend Cathy’s comment sums up the feelings of a great many Americans. She told me that despite the fact that she does not follow politics very closely, she feels like the President is doing exactly what he promised he would do. He promised the stimulus package by Presidents Day, and that actually happened. That meant a great deal to her and has restored some faith in the word of a politician for the first time in quite a while. God speed Mr. President.

Bike Week

2009-02-28T17:25:00.000-08:00

Whew! What a week it has been! RC’s granddaughter Cassie no sooner flew home when his friend Al and Al’s brother Dave arrived. Our old friends Jim and Joe came in on their Motorcycles and stayed for a few days, his place looked like Boy’s Town. Elaine had (friend) Kathy in for a week and Kathy’s parents stopped over for lunch and to tour TV. Mardi Gras was fun for all, although not as exciting as the real New Orleans thing that Erika got to experience this year. We had a hot dog roast after Sunday golf, and now the gang is off to Daytona for Bike week.

They are all staying at Elaine and Kevin’s condo in Daytona and will be back sometime Sunday. Kevin got this really cool Harley with a side car and he is the only one actually taking a bike to bike week. RC is threatening to buy a Harley next year. I worry that those razor sharp reflexes of his won’t be adequate to safely maneuver a Bike here in Florida. You have to drive like you are invisible because to many drivers, you are.

The house is very quiet. I got to see a movie that no one wanted to go with me to see (Milk, I highly recommend it), and I finished a book that I started quite a while ago. I stayed home to tend to the job (still hate it), deliver a cart and pick up E & K’s dog from the dogie hotel.

I am languishing in my solitude, but already know that I will be bored soon. Well it will be short lived as everyone will be home tomorrow and Briana is flying in Wednesday to update her CDL endorsements. Joyfully chaos again will rule my life. That is how we roll!

2009-02-19T08:07:00.001-08:00

Car in the drink!

2009-02-19T08:07:00.000-08:00

RC’s grand daughter came for a visit this week. She is a senior in high school. She cooked a turkey dinner with all of the trimmings for everyone. I thought that this was quite an accomplishment for someone so young to get all of the courses to the table at the same time. She has grown into a poised young lady. RC is very proud of her and he thoroughly enjoyed her company. We hope she comes back to visit again soon.

Tuesday I spent a good portion of my afternoon with Beth, her Mom and about 50 more voyeurs, watching divers recover a car from Silver Lake. The area was cordoned off with yellow police tape and cameras flashed all around the lake. If I am to believe the onlookers, the car had been in the lake for some time. It was a hoot to listen to all of the know-it–all onlookers pontificate about the story of the submerged car.

One onlooker proclaimed her disgust at the lack of urgency of the local police forces to ignore this submerged death trap for weeks. Another thought they knew the owner who “lost” his car after a night of partying a month ago. The alleged owner’s only concern was the $500 golf club that he left in the back seat. Someone else warned the divers of a 12 foot gator that has been know to frequent the lake. Beth thought it might emerge with bony hands clutching the steering wheel.

It seems pretty easy to entertain us here in TV. Some watched in their golf carts, others brought lawn chairs. Our buddy Tom’s house, only a few feet away from the scene of the crime, would have been the perfect place to fire up a grill and sell hot dogs to the crowd.

Travel Lust

2009-02-13T14:33:00.000-08:00

I am starting to get the travel lust again. I have always loved to travel, but for the past few seasons I have not had the urge to wander too far from TV. My sister in-law, Elaine and I used to travel together quite a bit, but lately I have been less enthusiastic when she has suggested a side trip and I did not know why exactly.

I suspected that I was living in a resort, so I had no need to go to a resort. What would I do at the all inclusive or on the cruise? Sit by the pool? Participate in pool side games? Eat and drink what I liked? Escape from work, and domestic chores? This sounds suspiciously like what currently goes on in my life daily.

I used to pride myself on my spontaneity. If someone asked me to run off to(fill in the blank), my overnight bag was packed and I was ready in a flash. Now the only thing that has changed is my back pack contains a bag full of heart meds and comfortable shoes.

In my teens I hitchhiked across country with three friends and just a backpack. In my twenties, my ski bum buddies and I would chase the ski season around until we found good powder, and drop everything to join my lawyer friends on comped gambling junkets from the Caribbean to Vegas.

Thirties brought a husband and kids, and we still loved to travel. My kids saw the world before they hit their teens. When Erika was little she went to Disney so often that when she saw a plane overhead, she would exclaim “They are going to see Mickey Mouse!” We weren’t rich, but I decided that due to my choice to be a working mother, only on vacations did the kids get my undivided attention and we, as a family, would put travel on our list of non-negotiatable essentials.

Wayne would want me to tell you about my “free” trip to England that cost him $10K. I won a radio station Beatles contest including round trip airfare for two to London and four nights at the Hilton. ...the but comes when I decided as long as we were over there, I needed to (A)Bring the kids, (B)Book side trips to Switzerland, Luxemburg, France… (you get the picture?) We had a great time and the kids got a history lesson that will stay with them for life. I think that trip may have been a contributor to Erika’s interest in teaching history.

I had the good fortune to have some travel at work. My specialty in rapid prototyping provided opportunities to attend training and conferences across the country and my position as Quality Network Rep and trainer for the UAW also brought me to interesting (and not so interesting like Detroit in January) destinations. Anyone who travels for work will tell you that some travel is great, but too much becomes tedious. I was fortunate to have a nice balance of travel and home time and I will always be grateful to the UAW for the many adventures that I experienced on their dime.

My girls have the travel bug too. Erika is planning a trip across Europe by rail this summer. She will be using Claudia’s (our wonderful exchange student) place in Lake Lucerne, Switzerland as a home base. She is giving this 2 month trip to herself as a graduation present. I am sure it will be a trip of a lifetime. Briana has the bug too. Part of the appeal of becoming big rig driver was the travel. She has already logged lots of miles from coast to coast, and had some fun in the process.

I have been drifting off, recently, to memories of several of my favorite places. New England and Northern Michigan have been contributing to my daydreams a lot. Not the cold weather New England and Black Lake Michigan, (both I remember fondly) but the lazy days on the beaches of the cape, and in the Pines of Michigan. Visions of the rocky shores of Maine and the covered bridges in Vermont on motorcycles bring me to a place both familiar and comfortable. Certain places and times of the year evoke vivid memories for me and that is one of the wonders that travel has brought to me through the years. In my mind I can almost smell the salty, fishy ocean and sweet pungent green pines.

The memories still stir the travel lust in my soul, so I begin one of my favorite parts of travel; the making of plans for my next journey. I think our motor home beckons me out this year. So much more to see, smell, taste, experience. I'll keep you all posted.

Feng Shui

2009-01-30T05:14:00.000-08:00

I am taking a Feng Shui course at the Lifelong Learning College. The class is taught by Dr. Ina Anderson, a bright, interesting person that I met at a discussion group at All About Art, a little boutique in Bellview. She has a wonderful broad based knowledge of the subject and a common sense Westernized approached to this ancient Chinese art. I am learning a great deal and am committed to organizing my messy life to help better channel my chi (energy).

One afternoon at the square last year RC and I were leisurely enjoying the busy season bustle and warm sun, when this guy taps RC on the shoulder. He says “Don’t you just love this place?” A total stranger couldn’t contain his enthusiasm any longer and just had to share his feelings about where we live. How many communities can boast that kind of resident reaction? We are truly blessed to be retired to TV.

I know there are problems and inequities in TV. I am generally glad that people like the POA are functioning in a watchdog role, but I can’t imagine why someone would choose to occupy the larger part of their lives to focus on the negative aspects of this place that we have chosen to live. Me, I am currently content to revel in the 90 percent good stuff that is going on in my life.

We joked when we first came to visit TV 5 years ago, that they put funny stuff in the water supply to make everyone so happy. The truth is that I have observed the community watch trucks spraying something late at night. Mosquito spray they claim, Prozac I suspect. Don’t you just love it here?

Crash

2009-01-26T13:55:00.000-08:00

I have been reminded of why I don’t go anywhere this time of the year by car. Yesterday I drove my daughter and her boyfriend to the airport. We had a wonderful long weekend together, although it passed too quickly. The guys like to golf on Sundays (and every other day), so I drove them to Orlando by myself.

I decided to stop into the new Sam’s Club on the way home. What a mistake! Parking was impossible and it was a zoo inside. The checkout line snaked around to the back of the store and the aisles were so full, it was impossible to take advantage of my favorite part of the Sam’s Club experience, food samples. Frustrated, I abandoned my shopping cart and decided to come back another day when the novelty had worn off. I did get my favorite Sam’s lunch of a Nathan’s hot dog and large drink for $1.82.

On my way out I decided to head into Leesburg to pick up a couple of things at Dockside. I was heading towards 441/27 in the left turn lane when this nut made a U turn from the right lane, right in front of me and hit the front end of my car.

From there in only gets worse; this hot head comes over to my car and starts yelling, in my face, that I was going to fast. OMG, this old coot just about gave me a heart attack, and he wants to shift the blame on me. He didn’t want to show me his license and when I told him I needed to confirm that he actually had a license he indignantly informed me that he was not an American (he is a Britt), and that should assure me that he obeyed the law. What? What does that even mean? Americans have no regard for the law? I got back into my car, rolled up the window, and called the cops.

One full hour later, he got a ticket for improper lane change, and while still chirping at me over his shoulder, got back in his car and headed home. His big mouth cost him another $140 for improper lane change, did a couple of thousand dollars damage to my car, and ruined my mellow Sunday plans.

I hope my golf cart will take me wherever I need to go until May. My sympathies to his poor wife.

Briana

2009-01-24T08:13:00.000-08:00

My youngest daughter, Briana and her boyfriend Anthony are in for a long weekend. I haven’t seen them in a while because she is always working. She is a big rig driver and is currently hauling groceries for Kroeger’s in Ohio. She is a hard worker with a strong determined will. I am so proud her. It is really good to see them both. I wish they lived closer.

We joined 19 friends and family for the fish fry at Orange Blossom Country Club. The food was great and a good value (AYCE fish for $10.95) and our server, Rachel was extraordinary! She was efficient and patient with us (gabbing while we should have been deciding what we wanted to eat), and the order came out in a flash, with barely a glitch.

We are taking them to Silver Springs today to see 38 Special. If you live here in TV and have not gotten your season pass to Silver Springs you are missing out on the bargain of all bargains. This nature park is old Florida at its best. It is Florida before Disney. It is where classics like Tarzan, Sea Hunt and I Spy were filmed. The beauty of the Springs and River by way of glass bottom boat rides alone are worth the $69. yearly pass price but when you add the free concerts (last year included Willie Nelson, Kenny Rogers, The Beach Boys to name a few) and the Christmas festival of lights it is too good to pass up. This jewel is only 25 miles north of us, very handicap friendly and I recommend the experience to everyone young and young at heart.

Cruel Role Reversal

2009-01-14T20:08:00.000-08:00

My in-laws are down for a month. Dad is going to be 90 this year and mom, well we say her memory is going, but the truth is she has Alzheimer’s. It is a cruel disease. She was a feisty, spitfire never at a loss for words. Opinionated and our fun, ever ready travel companion, it is difficult to see her withdraw in social situations for fear she will say or do the wrong thing.

They both served during WWII and that is the constant topic of conversation. It is sad to see that generation defined by a terrible war, and sadder to see the war she now fights inside her mind. She is at the stage that is perhaps the most difficult. She has many lucid periods, during which she is aware that she has forgotten things. She gets confused and embarrassed and sometimes angry at the tricks her mind is playing on her.

Dad is from the generation that men were not accustomed to being caregivers. The men went to work and were off the clock and in the easy chair when they came through the door. He always looked disdainfully at his son’s active participation in the care and feeding of our children and his domestic partnership with me. Now, he is forced to cook and clean and care for mom, and is doing his best though he is not happy about his unexpected role.

Dad told me that they have been retired for 23 years this year. They owned a TV and Appliance business in Lockport, NY. Since they retired they have done very little other than hang on to a house that is too big on 60 acre farm that he cannot manage in a climate that is cruel and harsh on old bones. They didn’t like to travel much because they had to leave the house (fear of break-ins or water damage), and they couldn’t afford to do the things they would have liked to because the farm cost them a fortune in taxes and upkeep. From my vantage point it seems like a lot of good years squandered.

I am thankful that my husband didn’t inherit all of his father’s German stubbornness. I am thankful that we had the courage to leave the big house and snow covered community where we worked and raised our family, behind. I am thankful for our health, and our ability to retire young. I feel fortunate to be able to complain about cold temperatures of 60 degrees (and no snow shovel required). I am happy we found this community in which to write the next chapter of our lives.

There is a lesson in here and I think it is my old friend “Carpe Diem”. Yes, seize the day! The future outlook holds no good news for Dad and Mom. His mother lived to be over 100, and it looks like they may both give her a run for the record. My mother used to say "These are the “Golden Years”, bull ----." I prefer to say make hay while the sun shines in The Villages!

Shucks, they got me again!

2009-01-10T18:18:00.000-08:00

I have not had time to blog this week as I have been taken hostage. My gang here talked me into taking a part time job. I don’t mean to whine (or do I), but I didn’t mean for this to happen. I have been perfectly happy in my new role as lady of leisure. While many of my friends have missed the structure and social aspects of a job, I did not. Sure we have made some adjustments financially since we have retired, but all in all, the things that I have cut back on, I seem to be living fine without.

It is only 3 hours a day and the pay is good but I liked to go to water aerobics at that time of day. My husband convinced me that our daughters last semester at NU and my kitchen remodel would be easier to finance if I’d take this little courier job for a bit, but I feel duped. I think that was the same line I was fed when I started at GM 30 some years ago. Did I fall for that trick again? Well it’s only for a bit, right?

Happy New Year!

2008-12-30T09:22:00.000-08:00

The holidays are drawing to an end. We had lots of guests, and lots to do. Last night we took my sister & clan into Orlando to meet up with the family that lived next door to us growing up in Tonawanda, NY. Connie looked Kyle up on the computer and to our surprise his brother Rob also lives here in Florida and his parents were visiting and all were available for dinner last night. What a treat to get caught up with all of them, they were like extended family, and sometimes you don’t know how much you miss people until you see them again. Ed & Joan live in Arizona now but with all of their kids and grand kids here in Florida and their active lifestyle they are great candidates for TV. I’m going to see if I can get them a lifestyle tour next year.

We are having a progressive dinner for New Years Eve. We will travel to the four corners of the villages by cart and eat too much and drink too much and enjoy our ever expanding group of friends. Every one is doing small plate type dishes this year as the full courses at each house last year was just too much! Watch out for us, we will be the crazies with the hats and horns! Happy New Year!

Merry Christmas! Happy Hanukkah! Happy Kwanzaa!

2008-12-25T06:12:00.000-08:00

Happy Holidays to everyone! I hope your holidays are filled with health, wealth, friends and family!

We had our annual white elephant gift exchange and Christmas Eve extravaganza at Molly’s house last night. My sister, Connie and her family are here for the holidays, and we had to clean up and tone down the gift exchange a bit to accommodate the presence of kids this year. We are sort of used to “adults only” type of partying but I really enjoyed having my niece, Hilary and nephew Taylor here for the party. Juvenile humor seemed to be the prevailing theme last night as the favorite white elephant gifts were the fart machine and the pooping reindeer. What can I say; I hope we all never grow up!

Taylor said he missed the snow a little, but loved being able to swim on Christmas Eve. I took him up to see the over the top Christmas display on Hillcrest. He was impressed; I think they are enjoying our tropical holidays! I let him drive me home on the golf cart, he did a great job! Hilary is so grown up; I am letting her learn to ride the scooters. Weren’t they both babies a minute ago? I miss my girls and wish they were here.

We are off to Wesley Chapel today, to visit more family. My cousin Maureen has a nice party Christmas day and Connie and Mike have not seen her family in years. Her Dad, my Uncle Frederick and his family will be there, along with my Aunt Gloria. Every year more of our clan seems to be migrating south. Easier on the bones here! Hope to lure a few more down next year, Colleen you ready yet?

The guys all get up every year at 5AM to take advantage of the free Christmas Day golf at the Championship courses. This year both RC and Wayne over slept and had to be dragged out of bed for this important male bonding thing (a bit too much Egg Nog last night boys?). It is a little hard for us non enthusiasts to fathom what would possess people who golf at least 5 days a week to get out of bed at such an ungodly hour, but I think FREE is the definitive word.

Merry Christmas! Happy Hanukkah! Happy Kwanzaa!

What have they done?

2008-12-12T14:34:00.001-08:00

I am saddened today, by what the short sighted outgoing losers in the Senate did last night. Killing the auto bridge loan may feel good to some cynics, and those that think they can remain unaffected but this will touch every American sooner or later.

Let me put a face on a couple of the “sooner” victims:

Meet my niece Stephanie. She is a sweet sprite of a girl, 23 years old. She is a talented artist. She got hired at the Delphi component plant in Lockport NY about a year before I retired. Steph is a hard worker, taking on the jobs in the plant, that most guys thought were too hard or too dirty. She liked those jobs because the day flew by and no one bothered her as long as she got the job done.

Stephanie quit college when her Dad (an electrician at the plant) got sick and died from colon cancer (a disease appearing 10X more often in the tradesmen at our plant, than in the general population). Steph has always wanted to return to college but due to concessions that the union labor force took, tuition assistance is not available to her and the $15.00 per hour she is getting paid was not enough to get her ahead enough to take a leave to go back to school.

Yes I said $15.00 per hour. No, not $70 per hour like the media reports; that figure includes, inflated projected costs for a benefit package none of the tier two employees ever received (health care reform anyone?), and the legacy costs of all of us that retired before them. I was the highest paid hourly employee in the place, a Journeyman in advanced engineering. and have never been paid more than $30/per hour ( I had a 4 year degree, 4 years apprenticeship, and hundreds of hours of additional specialty training).

Delphi is in its fourth year of bankruptcy, and after we were all forced out, the plant is now down to around 2000 employees from its peak of 11,000. Stephanie got her lay off slip today. The official word is it will only be for 6 weeks (Merry Christmas), but the rumors are that they will never be called back, now that the bridge loans have been killed.

Meet the Josie’s crew. Josie’s Place is a little gin mill around the corner from the plant. Mike and Barb, Diane and Jim are the second generation proprietors. Mike and Diane’s parents opened the bar and along with the income from their farm, and Big Mike’s job at Chevy, supported a large family on the regular factory crowd.

We frequented the place for its friendly atmosphere, good polish home cooking and reasonable prices. We looked forward to Lunches of Spaghetti on Thursdays, the Steak Special on Tuesdays and Fish Fry on Fridays.

After we all were forced out the business began to falter. Mike and Barb have a large family and are worried because they are just starting the college thing. Diane went into the factory (as a 2nd tier employee) when her husband Jim was forced out, to supplement their family’s income. She has since been permanently laid off, and the future is uncertain for the business and the families that depend upon it for their livelihoods.

So it goes in the small factory towns around the country. These are the faces that I want you all to see when I hear anyone say dump the Union, and let those businesses crash and burn, it’s their fault it came to this. Don't get me started.

Happy Holidays!

Artsy Fartsy Village

2008-12-11T21:17:00.001-08:00

I read the posting today on The Talk of the Villages by Cabo35 on a dreamy proposal for development where the Buffalo used to roam in Lake Sumter. It started me thinking again (I get into trouble when I do that sometimes) about a plan that has been rattling around in my head for the little area by the Post Office on our Historic side.

The area that I have had my eye on is behind 441, the section by the over pass, that I am told used to be the original Town Square. It is now occupied mostly by unremarkable Doctor’s offices and labs, a Crematory, a Barber, my favorite Mexican Restaurant, A Veterinarian, and a Sheriff's annex.

If I had a gazillion dollars to spend, I think I’d like to scoop up all of those clusters of Spanish style buildings on LeGrand Avenue and make an Artsy Fartsy Village that you could park and walk and explore. I can picture it becoming an “Old Towne” like I have visited in Tucson AZ, Jerome, Az, Albuquerque, NM, Sturgis, SD, Jackson Hole, Wy and several other quaint western cities. These quirky little artisan areas were filled with galleries, folk art boutiques, eclectic eateries, reflecting the old time local flavor of the city within which it was contained.

My new Village area would be a haven for artists, mystics, ethnic food, and be frequented by residents and tourists alike. Incense, pottery, candles and souvenirs would be available along with ice cream, hot pretzels and hot dog type food carts. Day spas and a Zen like tea house would be there to sooth the harried traveler. Music would fill the air, mixed with the smell of fresh flowers and home made candy.

I think it could become a destination, unlike anything that I have seen in our area. The closest that I can come to the ambiance I feel in my mind, here in Florida is St Augustine. Mount Dora has some of the type of shopping and eating establishments that I can picture here but I still would like to see something like this right here in the Villages. Mr. Morris?

Where the Buffalo used to roam.

2008-12-05T06:29:00.000-08:00

I took Erika with me to Yoga last night. She has a tendency to let her nervous energy distract her, and that scatters her focus and makes her less effective in general. I know about this because she inherited that gene from me. I have had to fight the “drunken monkey mind” (as my yoga teacher refers to it) all of my life. I have found some very effective calming techniques in yoga class and I would like Erika to see if they could help her stay on task and organized.

My weekly cart ride to yoga class has been filled with several experiences bordering on spiritual. Last night we witnessed a beautiful orange and red sunset that seemed to explode over Lake Sumter. Another night I saw a double rainbow, and on another trip I watched a big grey bird catch a snake for dinner.

But, the most amazing sight I have ever seen was just days before they took the Buffalo away. I witnessed the birth of a Buffalo calf. Several carts were stopped and I joined the dozen or so onlookers witness a miracle. Quietly we watched as the mother gave birth. Immediately, the rest of the heard gathered around their newest member and urged it with gentle noses to get up and therefore be safe from any predators that might be lurking in the area. Wow.

I miss the Buffalo. They had a special meaning for me. Being from the Buffalo NY area, I thought that the symbolism was, somehow destiny driven. This majestic beast was the symbol of my home community. This noble beast held sacred stature to my best friend’s people. The bison was the mascot of my Buffalo Bills! I loved bringing visitors to view this unusual sight in my Villages.

I wish that the Villages would not have taken them away. The rumor is that someone got too close and got a head butt, and sued. I am not sure about that story, but if true, I would think a double row of fencing would have been the less drastic approach to keeping people at a sensible distance from these large, dangerous wild animals. Personal responsible behavior, it seems is a thing of the past, and over the top knee jerk reaction is now the response to threat of lawsuits.

I am still suspicious; their grazing field may have been needed for the new development near Sumter, and the recent introduction of Buffalo meat to several of our local grocery stores shelves makes me beyond sad.

Best wishes Mr. & Mrs. Grabowski

2008-11-29T19:49:00.000-08:00

I performed my first wedding ceremony today. Beth’s daughter Jen and Mike are now husband and wife by my hand. I hope my beginners luck brings them many years of good fortune and happiness.

We had the ceremony in Beth’s front yard and a nice reception for 30 friends and family in the Chula card room. We changed gears and bar hopped on golf carts around TV until we ran out of steam (earlier for some of us than others).

Beth’s crazy fun family loves to surprise each other and this event was no exception. Her son Nate made a surprise visit from the New England cold, bringing all three of her grown children and their families together for Thanksgiving dinner for the first time in many years. Jen had this part planned long before she decided to get married. Beth was so surprised when Nate appeared at her kitchen window, she dropped a hand full of silverware, knives and all, dangerously on the floor!

But the surprises didn’t stop there, Beth’s sister Barb and her husband surprised everyone with a last minute decision to show up for the wedding. I had trouble remembering who knew who was coming in, when they would arrive, and where they were all staying. I wouldn’t be too good at this family espionage stuff, but it sure seems to work for them.

Happy Thanksgiving!

2008-11-27T10:19:00.000-08:00

Today is the day that we set aside to reflect and give thanks for all that we have. I am thankful for my health, my family and their health, and for good friends. Through the years we have been truly blessed and have often taken for granted the basic comforts that we have in this land of plenty. The food on the table, he roof over our heads, the right to work in a safe environment for a living wage, the freedom to choose and believe in values that make sense for each of our families.

The institutions that I have relied upon to protect these blessings have been threatened in the past few years. The roof over my head has been devalued, the banks that hold my 401k are near collapse, the company that holds my pension and has provided a great lifestyle for our family is in bankruptcy, the Union that protected my rights has been challenged, the armed forces that have insured my freedom have been put in harms way.

Still, this year I am not only thankful, but hopeful. America is unbelievably resilient. If we make mistakes, it seems that we have an unequaled ability to “course correct”.

So thank you to my friends, my family, the UAW, Delphi/GM, the US Armed forces. Good wishes to the new administration and to all of the newly elected folks. You have a big job ahead of you and the fix will not be easy or quick but if we stand together we can turn this mess around!

Happy Thanksgiving to everyone!

Cold weather sport

2008-11-22T20:01:00.001-08:00

The weather is very Un-tropical! It figures that when my daughter comes down from the stormy north, the weather turns coooollllddd. Well this is the excuse that I needed to go to see the movies that I have wanted to see. I haven’t been to the show in quite a while, but the cold drove me inside to see four different flicks. Here are the reviews:

Nights in Rodanthe – Sappy ad-nauseum. These characters were so over the top predictable (like harlequin romance characters), and the plot so lame that I should not have bothered grabbing extra napkins from the concession stand.

Quantum Of Solace- Action packed from beginning to end. Craig is the best Bond ever! I still don’t know what the movie’s title means.

Secret Life of Bees: The book was great and so was the movie. Queen Latifah should be up for an Oscar. All of the cast members were well developed and I longed to know more about their lives. Extra napkins please.

Body of Lies: Blood and guts movie; Thought provoking, with very graphic violence. DiCaprio and Crowe were believable, and the plot held my interest.

I am so sick of popcorn; I probably won’t have it again for a month.

Hurricane Erika

2008-11-20T12:58:00.000-08:00

Erika was supposed to fly in today at 2PM. She is a person that leaves too much to the last minute, and I predicted earlier this week that she would wind up in this dilemma. She missed her flight and has to sit in the airport for 8 hours to catch the next available flight. She is now scheduled to get in at 11:30 PM. Oh boy, a trip to the airport at Midnight. Hurricane Erika is blowing into town!

Beth’s brother Greg is also in town. He is looking for a nice 2 bedroom, 2 bath on the historic side. He’d like extra parking, and possibly a garage for his toys. He’s vowed not to leave until he buys a place (Like brother, like sister). Anyone have something that matches this description drop me a comment.

I have a noticed something interesting about alternative transportation methods. It seams that when using a transportation method other than the traditional, people feel a kindred connection. We have owned boats, motorcycles and now golf carts and it seams that when a brother/sister commuter passes it is customary to wave. I have seen bus drivers, Disney Jungle boat drivers; Trolley drivers also exhibit this friendly behavior. Does this apply to work vehicles (bull dozers for example), or is it only recreational vehicles? I am not sure if this applies to all vehicular travel, but I’ll bet if one space shuttle passed another the captains would wave or at least nod a space helmet.

I know initially upon our arrival to TV, this behavior made Wayne uncomfortable, but now he is a waver too. Wave on fellow travelers, I love to see your smiling acknowledgments, it lets me know I am not the only goofy happy Villager on the road (path).

Snowbird Season

2008-11-17T10:18:00.000-08:00

The snow birds are here, and our visitor season begins full force! I hear a lot of people complain about the inevitable, but I still look forward to most of the hustle and bustle the seasonal crowd brings. I don’t particularly like the traffic so I take my cart for every trip that is within the Bubble.

The golf courses are beginning to fill up. The guys are starting to go outside the Villages to golf more often. Like the leaves changing up north, this is an indicator that the seasons are changing. Maybe now they can justify the charity (sweat shop) grounds maintenance work that they do at that outside golf course, by actually using the free golf that they earn.

We just said goodbye to last week’s crop. Molly’s beautiful grand daughter, daughter and cousin and Wayne’s Brother and his wife just left when the next wave begins.

Our friend Vern is in for a couple of days. His sweetheart of a wife, Cathy didn’t join him this trip. They have a brand new Grand Daughter and I think he will have quite a hard time dragging her away this year. Daughter #1, Erika is flying in Thursday for an extended visit, Elaine and Kevin will be here Friday for a long weekend.

Beth’s Daughter Jen and family are all coming down for Thanksgiving. Jen is getting married here and I am performing the ceremony. I’m a Notary, and this is one of the few States that I can marry people. How weird is that? The guest list for this celebration keeps growing. What started as a small gathering of a few of us, has grown to 35 plus. I am looking forward to a wonderful event, but it has Beth a little nervous.

Initially we were going to do the reception in my back yard, but we got scared when the weather started getting cold, and booked a card room. At least I got Wayne to paint my driveway, on the expectation of the gathering at my house. I think I could have gotten the fountain I bought on Ebay, hooked up if we would have waited a bit longer to tell him about the change of plans.

I hope the novelty of visiting us in TV never wears off for our friends and family. Each new visitor brings a spark and keeps our lives interesting. It also gives us an excuse to show off TV and to throw a party!

Ya'all wont fries with that??

2008-11-10T15:16:00.000-08:00

Wayne’s brother Gary and his wife Carrie have finally come down to visit. We have been trying to lure them down here for the past 3 years. It’s their 25th wedding anniversary this week and we are thrilled to show them around. They are still working with tuition to pay, so it will be a while before they can retire, but we’d love to see them consider TV in the future. We’re thinking of taking them to Cape Canaveral Friday for the Shuttle launch.

The pace is much slower here in the South. When we first came down here it bothered me WAY more than it does now. I was the one in line with the veins in my neck throbbing and my face purple. I was the one ready to grab the Burger King girl by the neck when she finally asked me if “Ya’allllll….. wont…….fries…….. with……that……..Woooooppppeeeerrrr???? (Don’t they know what FAST FOOD means?) Y’all must be from New York, she would comment. How’d she know that?

I was the nut weaving traffic to get 2 cars ahead of the pack. I got 2 speeding tickets in the first month I was down here. I don’t drive outside the bubble anymore. I have come a long way. I now understand why we siesta, and that manna does not mean tomorrow, it just means not today.

If I find myself getting impatient now I just take a breath and remind myself that I am retired, and I have no where that I have to be. If I get there 2 minutes later, nothing will change, no one will care. Now I only have to have “the talk” with myself occasionally.

Soilent Green

2008-11-09T10:00:00.000-08:00

RC Hosted a Texas holdem’ poker party last night. My cards stunk, but after wearing Joe down, I split the last pot. That broke me even (that’s what all gamblers say), and the combination of good company and frozen Daquri’s made for another great Saturday night in The Villages!

The election is over and my candidate won. My mood is tempered, however, as the candidate that my daughter worked her tail off for narrowly lost his bid for NYS Senate. On any Election night over 50% of the candidates, many very qualified, fine people of character do not win. That does not make them losers.

Politics is a very tough game and my Erika is a very sensitive young woman. She bleeds for everyone that hurts. I love that about her, but I am still inclined to hop on the school bus and spank the bully that hurts her feelings. She will see in hind sight that she was an important part of a historical take over of the NYS Senate by the Democrats. Her hard work and dedication to a wonderful candidate (Former Heavyweight boxer Joe Mesi), will reap rewards long after last Tuesday’s honorable showing. Good job team Erika!

I have been disturbed by something that Beth casually commented on the other day. Where are the cemeteries in and around the Villages? I don’t mean to be morbid, but this is a community of older folks, and unlike other places I have lived, I don’t see funeral processions, lead by black hearses. I don’t see the churches filled with funeral services. I see the Ambulances, and read the notices in the paper but I don’t remember seeing, well, the next logical ceremonies. Does anyone remember the book (or movie) Soilent Green?

I am so proud of this country!

2008-11-04T20:17:00.001-08:00

Barack Obama 44th President of the United States of America~

I am so proud of this country!

A rest for the weary.

2008-11-01T19:02:00.000-07:00

The Halloween party last night at Molly’s was a classic. We went as the Village People. Wayne was the construction worker, I was the Cop and RC was the Native American. Ron was Hillary, Beth a Harem girl. Wendy was a clown & Mark a Biker, Jeff a scary cloaked dude. Molly got her pirate costume in Key West and Joe was himself in 20 years complete with suspenders and over the calf socks and sandals.

Starry, starry night was tonight in the Polo grounds. The astrology club had high powered telescopes set up for anyone with an interest, to view the night sky. I saw Jupiter and three of its moons, a Nebula, and Twin Stars. What a place.

I made my last calls to GOTV for Obama. People are sooooo sick of this election. Take pity on those poor souls who call you on the phone to prod you to vote. I love the political stuff, but even I can’t wait till it’s over. It’s been going on for two years now.

I am enjoying being out of a political leadership role, this election. I am hiding out. It is a relief to just make phone calls and leave the organizing, recruiting, scheduling, cajoling, scrambling, funding spinning, refereering, and all of those other responsibilities to someone else. I might get the urge to do more later, (or not) but I think a lot of us are burned out. For now I am very content doing grunt work.

More Visitor's

2008-10-29T14:38:00.000-07:00

Tomorrow is my only sister, Connie’s birthday. Connie never lets me forget that she is 8 years younger than me. Happy Birthday Sis! Connie and her family are finally coming to visit us this year. They are coming for the holidays, and I can’t wait to see them. I miss her and her husband Mike & my niece and nephew, Hilary and Taylor.

The year before last Connie’s mother-in law, Mary rented Elaine’s place for a month. I was glad to teach this sweet shy woman how to drive a golf cart, and proudly watched her venture out on her own around the Villages. She was a widow, and had lost her traveling companion (her sister) the year before. She was, however, determined to continue to travel even if it meant by herself.

Mary was a bit unsure how she would manage when she arrived, but soon I would see her cart parked just over the bridge near the square in the early evenings. She loved the music. Mary soon found a nice church, over here on the historic side that made her feel at home, and tried several other activities. She invited a niece visit and we included her in our celebrations.

I really enjoyed getting to know her better and think she enjoyed herself. It is nice to see how people not naturally very outgoing or adventurous feel safe expanding their horizons here in TV. I hope she comes down to visit again, perhaps when Connie and her family are here.

VOTE!

2008-10-25T18:39:00.000-07:00

We voted today. I have not missed an election since I cast my first vote for McGovern. Being from NY it is very weird to be able to vote early. Having heard about filing cabinets full of uncounted absentee ballots during the last two stolen elections in Florida, I was understandably leery of voting early. The Obama campaign, however, has urged us to vote early, so I hope all of our votes will be counted this time. If the type of foolishness that occurred here during Gore’s win/loss/win/loss happened in another country I’m sure that we would be the first country to send troops to “liberate” those poor voters, robbed of their democratic rights. Who will liberate us if it happens again? It was my honor to cast my vote today for Barack Obama.

I have found a few bastions of Liberal philosophical thinkers near and about the Villages. I have been sporadically attending services on Sundays at a nice Unitarian Universal Church recently opened near the Marion Market. The Tri-County Democrats are a spunky, visible, active bunch. They have reminded me that the Republican majority here is a mere 51% (33% Dems,16% other).

Beth and I share an interest in things metaphysical and we have found a nice group of like minded people who meet for a monthly discussion at a place called All About Art in Belleview. Beth’s friend Vicky teaches several classes there. We took a bus trip last year to Cassadaga, a nearby spiritual community that reminded me of a similar community in NY called Lillydale.

I take Yoga through the college from a wonderful couple, Jack & Corin Krier. This is a gift I give myself every week. She has the voice of an angel and the quiet peace they radiate, inspires me. I have also heard that an interesting group of free thinkers have formed a philosophy club that I might look into.

This place has something for everyone, even a (gasp) Liberal Democrat from NY!

Happy double nickel Beth!

2008-10-23T13:41:00.000-07:00

Joe got a 58’ TV and we ate pizza and watched Tampa Bay take on the Philly’s in the World Series. What a TV! It’s like being at the drive in.

We went back to WNY for a bit this summer. Wayne decided that gas was too expensive to take the motor home so that meant that we would have to go north in shifts. RC stayed and cared for the animals and Wayne & I took off at the end of May. We have a cottage on a private Lake a few minutes from 6 Flags Darien Lake. We bought the cottage with my in-laws the year Erika was born and we never spent enough time there. It is nice and quiet but I get restless and after 6 weeks I was glad to switch places with RC and head back to The Villages.

One of the things I realized on my trip back to NY was that we were very fortunate to find this alternative lifestyle that we have found in TV. We visited some of our old haunts and I was a little disturbed to see that nothing much had changed. I could have predicted who would have been sitting on which barstools at which local bars. A few of my friends found new jobs, but many were simply marching in place. The same life without the regiment of work would not have been a good thing for me.

No one has mapped out how we boomer retirees should proceed. Never has a generation of people been faced with the possibilities that we have been faced with. It is truly a blessing that we have been given the opportunity to retire young, but with that said, how should we be filling our time? The generation before us saw themselves as work horses defined solely by their work. They planned to work until they were unable, and then die. We, on the other hand, planned, saved, and raced toward the golden ring of retirement, and may face four decades or more of “life after job”.

The beauty of the Villages is the variety of things to do. In our little band, we have all found little niche businesses or part time jobs. One of us has taken a job in retail, one has taken a part time job keeping the facilities at Sumter in tip top shape, one does home repair and we repair snaps and straps on cart covers. We also have a couple of carts that we rent out and that keeps the guys busy enough. I have been threatening to get my Real-estate license again, but I really like this retirement pace. Every one of us has tried something very different from what we did in our past work life.

People work for different reasons. It is very interesting to me to realize that it may be more than the primal need to feed and shelter the pups that drives us to work. I think there is some guilt driving the need to continue to work, as our culture defines our worth by our job, but I seem to be getting over this. In a bad economy, it seems almost selfish to take a job from someone that needs one (or am I rationalizing?).

Again I have to thank the UAW for giving us all the chance to retire with dignity, comfortably, young and healthy.

Line Dancing Police

2008-10-22T10:14:00.001-07:00

We have just returned from a long weekend in Key West. Five of us took our motor home down for the less hectic weekend preceding Fantasy Fest. We had a blast in this weird and wild island at the far reaches of our country. It makes me proud to be an American. Our diversity makes us strong and interesting (and maybe a little weird). The next time you hear someone complain about a person or group that does not look, sound or worship exactly like them take the time to stand up for and defend those “different Americans”. It saddens me to hear the right wing politicals complain that anyone that has a different point of view, is somehow Un-American. I say lets revisit the principles upon which this country was founded: A bunch of immigrants escaping persecution, fighting for freedom, equality, right to pursue etc…

Rich has given me some lip regarding my use of real first names in this blog. He thinks the names should be changed to protect the innocent. Although I don’t think there is an innocent among us, Rich will now be referred to as R.C. (Richard Cranium), and the jury shall disregard any previous reference to him by any other name.

There are certain things that my husband, Wayne has sworn he will never do here in the Villages. He will never walk a dog that can fit into his pocket and he will not line dance.

When we first came to the square he decided that he should be the line dancing police. It seemed to him that there should be some sort of penalty for line dancing to Pink Floyd. “I’m sorry mam, but you are under arrest for line dancing to a legendary Rock and Roll Band.” R.C. however swears that he will get Wayne to dance to the McDonalds song. I don’t know who will win this conflict, but it should be an interesting battle.

My 100+lb black lab, Lady McBeth (Betty for short) hopes that he never will need to trade down to a pocket dog. She is a beautiful loyal friend who is getting old. Her hips bother her and she spends all day watching people go by the house from the couch on my lanai. She's a watch dog, you know. Her Vet thinks she should loose weight, but she thinks she is just retaining a little water or may be a bit big boned. She loves the slower pace here in the Villages, and the two acres on the water that she used to run around in NY is a vague memory.

Her mother, Sable, passed away during my second trip down here to the Villages. I cried for days, and I still miss her. She was smarter, and more energetic than her offspring, and she would have missed running free. Betty, however, will be perfectly happy spending her last years here on the porch. She may not fit in your pocket, but her personality is a little poodle-like.

Wayne said to shoot him if ether of these things ever happens. I don’t like guns, but if he insists…

T-Bone

2008-10-15T12:58:00.000-07:00

The last debate is tonight. I hope everyone that cares about this country will listen to Obama and keep an open mind. The Republicans have ruined our economy, made us the most hated nation in the world, and attacked nations that have committed no aggression against us while ignoring those who did (21 hijackers on 9/11 were Saudi). The Clintons left us after 8 years of peace and prosperity, then came W.

Ask yourselves these questions before we make the same mistake again: Are we better off now? Are we safer now? Can McCain’s belief in de-regulation work with all of these greedy people in control? What would have happened if the Republicans had their way and Social Security had been privatized when the stock market crashed? Can our country survive 4 more years of the same policies?

My daughter’s best friend is a very religious born again Christian. She gives me hope as she is supporting Obama because, for the first time she has decided to vote based on what is best for the country rather than her beliefs on choice. Don’t let the “hot button” issues and rhetoric drive your decision.

We are going to watch the debate and have a drinking game. We will do a shot every time McCain says “Fight or MY Friends”.

Our neighborhood on the prehistoric side is quite interesting. We have a T-bone bachelor’s row going on here. To our right is a Brit named Roy, Alias Nigel in the book Leisureville. Roy gets quite puffed up when someone recognizes him as the character in the book as he is referred to as “having the good looks of an aging film star”. Several houses down lives a single guy that we refer to as “Chemical Ricky”. He is an experienced golf course maintenance person and always trying to help us save our shabby lawns, and trees with some secret chemical treatment (its best I know nothing about the contents of his spray bottle).

Next door is my best friend Rich. We have been best friends for over 20 years. He was my Journeyman into the Model Making trade at Delphi, and the rest, as they say, is history. He had a conversation with a guy when we first got down here and when the guy found out that he was a single guy in living the Villages he started calling him T-bone. Finally Rich asked him what was up with the T-bone stuff.

The guy told him that he knew many ladies that cruised the hot spots in the villages looking for their “T-bone dinner”. They would pick out a guy and tag him as theirs, get him interested in dating, then ask him to move in. The girls liked nice dinners, cruises etc. They didn’t want T-bone’s money but would suggest he sell his house and put the proceeds into a joint bank account. When the inevitable happened, well let’s just say these ladies could turn a T-bone about every 5 years. At 60, Rich is probably a little young to be a true T-bone, but the concept still makes us chuckle.

Cheeseburger in Paradise!

2008-10-13T19:10:00.000-07:00

After the nightly round of golf, the guys called and told me to meet them at the Tiki Bar in Orange Blossom Country Club for drinks and dinner. They had a special; Margarita’s for $2 and Cheeseburgers for $3, what a cheap date. The DJ was leading the poolside games for Margarita glasses and Joe and Molly won the modified beer pong. It doesn’t get much better than this.

The second year in the Villages was fun filled. We had a crowd for Thanks giving and the Christmas white elephant gift exchange party was a smash! Molly’s sister came to visit and we had an 8 cart caravan tour to see the lights around the different Villages. We had an old fashioned progressive dinner for New Years, traveling by carts for a six course meal. We also celebrated belated weddings for Elaine & Kevin and Ron & Beth as both couples snuck away to Vegas to get married depriving us of a good party.

Our visitors were non stop. Dave & Carol, a friends from the Model Shop, spent New Years with us. Sue & Tom came down for a month, They settled in like they belonged here. Wayne’s best friend since high school, Kevin and his family came down several times. His wife Michelle has health issues that would be greatly improved down here and we hope to lure them in when their kids are a bit older. Billy Jo visited Beth several times, as did several more friends and all of her kids and grand kids. Molly and Joe had their houses full of visitors all winter. Rich’s family and friends rolled in and out and we all couldn’t be happier showing off our Shangri la.

We all had our parents down for a visit. Wayne’s parents are almost 90 and still struggling up north in the snow on the farm where his dad was born. I would love to have them live down here but roots that deep are hard to dig up. Every year it worries us more to have them 1500 miles away. They retired over twenty years ago and are still stubbornly staying put in a house that is too big, on a farm that they cannot manage, in a climate that is too harsh. I had hoped that being here and seeing how easy the living here was would convince them, but no luck yet. Rich's Mom came down the year before. She is a warm wonderful person, that he wishes he saw more of. She got us to go to Bingo and made me feel like a rookie as she had to watch my cards and hers! We hope she will come down from that Frigid Canada North Country again soon!

I miss my kids terribly. They drove down in January and we celebrated and exchanged gifts. I wish they were closer. Briana and her boyfriend are now driving over the road big rig cross country. She decided criminal justice was no longer what she wanted to do and dropped out of college. She’s a hard worker and makes me very proud. Erika is almost done with her teaching degree. She is struggling to decide if her calling is politics or teaching. She wants to move to NYC. I am sure she will be a success at what ever she chooses, I am proud of her too.

This list of visitors is only about half of the crowd we had down last year and I am totally looking forward to next year’s crop. We should get paid for all of this free advertising. I say the more the merrier and hope more of my friends and family join us here in the Villages.

The Quilt of our Lives

2008-10-13T14:20:00.000-07:00

We had a birthday party for Wayne yesterday. I made lasagna, Molly brought a big salad and Beth baked him his favorite chocolate chip pie. The fun day ended in a really bad way as our friends Jeff and Sharon had their vintage Corvette parked in front of the house and we heard a bang. We got up to see a guy, who appeared totally blitzed, backing up his cart probably getting ready to take off. The damage to Jeff & Sharon’s pristine car will probably be in the thousands and this guy appears to have nothing. I am just sick for them.

Speaking of Jeff and Sharon, we began expanding our little band of friends to include other like minded people. Beth’s daughter, Jen, a vivacious spark of energy, came to visit and introduced us to her new pool friend, Tom. Tom splits his time between here and PA, and became a regular golf buddy for the guys during the months he lives here. His lifelong friend Jeff and his wife Sharon are a fun and interesting couple who like to golf, laugh and party. Jeff helps out with maintenance at a nearby golf course and got Rich & Wayne hired as lawn boys (grounds keepers they will argue) for free golf. They feel like old friends.

Ron’s friends Darren & Shelly live on the coast and bought a place on speculation and visit from time to time when their place isn’t rented. Beth found Mark & Wendy, who she knew from Lockport, by chance in the phone book the summer before last. They live on the other side but we really like them anyway (ha, ha). Molly and I go to water aerobics every day and have met a friendly, intelligent woman named Catherine.

These people, and others to numerous to mention, all add to the brightly colored fabric of our life in the Villages. I don’t know if everyone here has such an easy time finding people that they can relate to, but I find the atmosphere laid-back, friendly and warm. It is an easy place to make friends or just have a pleasant conversation. I think the saddest prospect would be to retire and be lonely and bored. The Villages, so far, has not allowed any time for that foolishness!

Westward Ho!

2008-10-10T18:40:00.000-07:00

What a rain storm we had last night. Over 3 inches of rain fell in less than an hour. Tornado warnings set off my weather radio and my lanai flooded. Next thing you knew the stars were out and it was as if it never happened. That’s weather in the tropics.

Spring came and Rich, Wayne and I planned to take the Motor home cross country and then head back North for the summer. Out US 10 and back US 40 from coast to coast. We started our Journey March 1st. I don’t know what we were thinking but the weather was not yet settled that time of year.

We had a great time crossing the Florida panhandle, saw the French Quarter of New Orleans, went to Rodeo with my brother in Houston & visited the Alamo in San Antonio. We bought cowboy boots in Amarillo; saw the awesome caves at Carlsbad. The California coast was nice. Erika flew out to join us in San Diego and came with us to Las Vegas. We rode the scooters through the mountains near Tucson and Sedona was mystical.

The trouble began as we headed back East. Tornado season was in full swing. We went north the storms followed. We went south baseball sized hail greeted us. Snow was still falling in NY so we cut our losses and headed back to the Villages for the month of April.

We decided to sell the house in Pendleton and May meant we had to head back to NY. We had a million things to do to get the house ready to sell. Because of the in ground pool and waterfront location it’s features were best showcased in the summer.

Rich and Wayne worked nonstop for 2 months to get the “Ponderosa’s” grounds ready for showing. July 1st we put it on the market and the next major project began, the pole barn at the cottage where we could store all our things when the house sold. Emotionally I thought I’d have enough trouble selling my house, but selling the contents would have to wait until I was ready.

First they had to clear the property of about 40- 80ft pines. The 2 story 24 x 30 barn took the rest of the summer to build. The house sold and I was very glad to have an alternative to renting storage or moving my houseful of antiques to Florida. As much as I was certain that the Villages was now home, I couldn’t stand the thought of seeing my house empty, so I snuck off to Florida and left the move to the guys.

Activities: A day in the life

2008-10-07T13:24:00.000-07:00

October is my favorite time in Florida. The weather has been a perfect mix of sun and nice temperatures. Wayne wore his Obama shirt to the square last night and a couple of girls from Seattle shook his hand and told him he was brave. They were visiting their parents in the Villages and counting the days (4 years) until they can retire here. Been there! It’ll go fast.

I retired October 13, 2006. I never made it in for my last day of work. We wound up stranded in a brutal ice storm that knocked out power for 5 days. We had just purchased a 38 ft Motor home and made the best of the situation by living in the camper. I wasn’t supposed to go back to Florida until November, but as soon as the power went back on I booked a flight and said good-by to winter forever! The guys were working on a congressional campaign and came down in the camper in November.

We settled in to our new life in the Villages. Everyone found a niche: Beth liked dance, Joe liked spinning, Wayne and Rich liked line dancing (that’s a joke), and I found water aerobics and yoga. The guys golfed every day and in the evenings we went to the square, played scrabble or Texas Holdem’. We watched our Bill’s games at Gringo’s, and found the WNY club. We went to craft shows, art festivals, St Patrick Day, Dingus Day and Mardi Gras celebrations. Just about any excuse broke out into a party, celebrated with a “u sucker” cake.

We had a field trip or activity just about every month. We took the motor home (and our new motor scooters) to visit my Aunt & Uncle in the Keys, saw a NASCAR race in Daytona, went to a Sabers hockey game, took a trip to the Hard Rock Casino, and saw a Baseball game in Tampa.

My youngest, Briana and her boyfriend Anthony had moved to Florida and she was working for the Tampa Devil Rays. She got us tickets and we went to visit her at Ruby Tuesdays where she also worked before the game. She and I had been working through some lifestyle issues, and I was hopeful that she was healthy happy and safe. I think the hardest part about being a parent is knowing when to let go, and when to interfere.

Molly bought a cute house around the corner on her next trip down. She had already sold her house up north and planned to move down full time in the spring. Elaine found one bathroom was a challenge with the boys and bought a larger home a few houses down and Rich bought her house right next door. It seemed that one of us had visitors every week over the winter and we kept busy showing off the Villages and entertaining.

God bless the UAW for providing us the opportunity to retire with dignity and enjoy this lifestyle!

Get down in a Ditch!

2008-10-05T13:26:00.000-07:00

I went to the Movies last night and saw Blindness. It is based on a Pulitzer Prize winning book that Erika found and I read last year. The movie was disturbing, as was the book. The book was written in a stream of consciousness style and was a hard read until you got into the rhythm. I thought the movie stopped a bit short.

I always heard of people who stayed all day to see other movies in the multi-plex’s but never tried this scam. I had nothing better to do so I decided to sneak into the Brad Pitt/George Clooney movie, “Burn after Reading”. I was glad I didn’t pay to see it, but had a laugh or two.

Back to the Story: Our good friends Joe and Molly arrived the night of the Tornado. Joe was one of the first people that I thought about when we first came to the Villages. He was an Electrician at Delphi, and an avid golfer, and liked to stay busy. We’d been friends for 30 years and he had recently begun dating Molly. Molly is the youngest of our group. She was a Union officer who was barley 19 when she started at Delphi. I had always liked and respected Molly. She’s smart, has a quick wit and laughs easily. They must have wondered what they got into when the Tornado hit.

My emergency plan left something to be desired. I went to bed that night confident that the weather was way north of us. At 3 AM I woke to the warnings from the weather guy that if you were in a mobile home, get down in a ditch or somewhere safe. I laid awake a bit wondering where the dog’s leash was and considered getting everyone up. The next thing I knew I had fallen back asleep, it was morning and the power was out. Not a great plan. I’ll have to do better next time. Thank god there will be an opportunity to be a next time. We took our carts over to Mallory to see the damage and were in shock at the carnage.

Joe must not have been too upset about the weather because before the end of his vacation he bought a place a few blocks away. He mused that he had spent a lot of money on vacation in the past, but this seemed excessive.

We have all committed to the early retirement package and are considering the month we will go. Our leadership has STRONGLY advised us all to consider the offer. As Dylan said: “The times they are a changing”. We are assembling quite a group here on the Historic side. I couldn’t be happier to be able to share my retirement with all of these wonderful friends.

The Suckers Club is born

2008-10-03T18:29:00.000-07:00

October 3, 2008

I didn’t blog last night as I was trying to listen to the VP debate. This is a scary time with all the trouble we are up to our necks in Sarah is still a serious contender for the 2nd most powerful position in the world. Darn right.

Back to the Village journey: We had our place rented for most of the first year. With the big house up north still hitting my pocket book hard, we thought it best to limit our expenses in Florida while we prepared to retire. We did come down for April and May that year.

My friend Beth and her boyfriend Ron came down on a mission. She had decided the Villages could be the place for her and Ron. She, like most in our group, had a plan to work another decade. But life sometimes throws you a curve ball. She began an organized assault on the task at hand. Buy a place in 5 days.

We visited open houses, combed the Daily Sun cruised around looking for “sale by owner homes”. They also liked the Historic side. She had lists, evaluations and finally found a site built that she liked, and then promptly bought an adorable double wide about 2 blocks from us. She returned home, sold her house and made plans to move to the Villages right after she retired.

Ron and Beth were great additions to our posse’. Ron and the guys hit it off right away; they were as crazy as we were. We laughed about the diverse offering of clubs for us in the Villages. Something for everyone it seemed. We kidded that the only club we did not see offered was the pot smoking, wife swapping club. Now I read in Leisureville that one does exist under the cover of the wine tasting club. Ron’s colorful vocabulary sometimes shocked the quiet locals and it was noted that certain words served him as descriptive for all occasions. The suckers club was born.

After several months in the healing sun, my heart condition took an unexpected turn for the better. My doctor was amazed, and I returned to work to wrap up a 30 year career in the auto industry.

Too much trouble to make new friends. Why not bring my old ones with me?

2008-10-01T21:03:00.000-07:00

October 1, 2008

I tried a new water aerobics class at the Savanna pool and liked the workout, we went to the square tonight the band was good. What a place, if someone tells you that they are bored, shame on them.

I convinced my doctor that my job was not very stressful (appointed union officer at a bankrupt company no stress there) and returned to work. We posted a notice at the bulletin board to rent out the place for the months that none of us planned on being in Florida and the response was great. Lots of people were curious about the Villages. They might have seen ads on golf shows, or knew someone that had been there, and I was glad to share my great experiences. My friend Tom had been one of the prospective friends I had originally thought would be a good candidate for the Villages. He loved golf and his wife (one of my childhood friends) is very health conscious and would love the variety of activities and pools. I was in his office one afternoon showing pictures and sharing stories when another friend, Beth took an interest. They both expressed an interest in visiting.

Soon after returning to work the rumors of early retirement offers were confirmed and it began looking like we would be offered an early retirement package. I had 28 years seniority and a full 30 year pension was being offered to me now. I thought what a gift I am being given. Not everyone felt that way. Some friends stubbornly refused to even look at the offers. Others stressed about how young we were and worried about inadequate savings and the future of our pensions held by a bankrupt company.

Returning to work so soon after getting my defibrillator was probably not the best idea, as my condition was not improving. I gave up my position as Democratic County Chair and went back out on sick leave and made plans to go back to the Villages. So much for Rich’s plans to enjoy a bachelor pad in Florida.

Wayne’s sister Elaine (one of my favorite people in the whole world) was also going through major changes in her life. She retired, married a great guy with two great boys, sold her house and moved about two hours away from her hometown. She had visited the Villages last year and liked it so much when the house next to ours went up for sale on the internet she bought it sight unseen. My evil plan was beginning to take shape. I had decided that it would be too much trouble to make new friends. Why not bring my old ones with me?

Feels Like Home

2008-09-30T17:52:00.000-07:00

September 30, 2008

I’m feeling a bit more positive today. The stock market came back a bit, maybe it is not the beginning of the end of our economy. Made a few calls for Obama. I am still shocked his numbers have not gone through the roof but as my good friend Brad always said “Never underestimate the ignorance of the voters.”

The Pre-Historic side of the village is a dirty little secret that the sales staff and promoters of the Villages would just as soon keep in the family. It may have been where the community began, but it does not quite purvey the image that the place is currently trying to promote. The Trolley or the Sales team seldom brings prospective new Villagers past these homes. I, however, found it quaint and homey. The large trees and quirky mobile homes were a warm contrast to the cookie cutter homes with the stark Stepford like landscaping of the new neighborhoods. I found a double wide on the water and rented it for a few of the cold months.

I returned to New York still planning to return to work a few more years. Rich and I were going to split the rental and I made plans for my family to join us in the Villages for the Holidays. Rich was retiring and invited his family down for some time in January. My health was still an issue, but I felt better in the stress free sunshine. My kids and in-laws came down for a visit and we all had a great winter. This place feels like home.

Prices all over the Villages were going through the roof, and I started to feel like if I didn’t get into the market soon, I would not be able to afford anything. Rich challenged me to “Get off my ass” and buy something. So the next day I did. We went to see a “for sale by owner” around the corner from our rental. It was an older double wide, and smelled like it had been owned by smokers, but owner financing was what sealed the deal. We called Wayne, who had gone back north to work, and agreed to buy it. We were closed in weeks, and were now official Villagers.

Rich was jubilant. He was the token old guy and the only one in our click actually old enough to be in the Villages. He had retired, recently divorced, and figured he’d have the place to himself for years before Wayne and I retired. He was wrong.

Cat Food

2008-09-29T13:48:00.000-07:00

September 29, 2008
The economy is in the dumpster today. Isn’t it ironic that at this stage of our lives we have to worry about money? We played by the rules: Saved in our 401k (now at risk in the stock market), tolerated a job for 30 years in exchange for the security of a pension (now held by a bankruptcy trustee), paid into social security (likely the next victim), and invested in real estate (bottom dropping fast) and still face the real possibility of financial peril. I never wanted to be rich, just didn’t want to eat cat food in my “golden years”.

I have made a commitment to make phone calls for the Obama/Biden ticket every Monday, but am feeling a bit to down to do it tonight. I’ll be better tomorrow.

Back to the Villages story: I had been reading about communal living (I used to be a hippy) and wondering how I might purchase acreage in a place like New Mexico to build my green compound, when it occurred to me that the Villages could be a less drastic alternative. I returned home with a mental list in my head of my friends that I could picture living in the Villages. I ticked off about 15 potential friends and relatives. Some were golfers but others were like me, sun worshipers. Wayne was still not convinced that central Florida was far enough south that he would never have to put on a sweater again. I figured that I still had another 5 years to make a decision when my health took a dive.

I had always been healthy. My doctor misdiagnosed the condition for close to a year and by the time he took my persistent cough and constant fatigue seriously, my heart was barely keeping me alive. I was finally diagnosed with a virus in my heart. I was told I would have to eliminate all stress from my life, and take it VERY easy until they could put a defibrillator in. My doctor’s bedside manner was brutal and he let me know that the prognosis was not good. He assured me that if I could be satisfied with a sedentary life I could probably survive with medication. Great, at 50 years old I could retire from a job I loved (though the company had recently gone into bankruptcy), stop being County Democratic Chairman (no stress there), give up all physical activities and vegetate for a few years till I die. Shit, I might as well be dead already.

I have always been a bit on the “Carpe diem train” but this pushed me over the edge. I told my doctor to cure me, not manage me as I was 50 not 80, and I began the push to get better. Long story short, I took my sick leave and went back to the Villages. My best friend, Rich and I also took a trip to Arizona to Sun City, Pebble Creek and looked at other communities in Florida, figuring the Villages must be one of many choices. I looked for something inter-generational as I always hoped my family would live near me forever, but didn’t find anything that fit the bill.

I still had my reservations about the Villages. My life was a bit to “messy” for a planned community like the Villages. I had big dogs, 2 cats and almost grown kids, and I was a Democrat. My husband was raised on a farm and liked to tinker with messy stuff in the driveway and did not like neighbors in his business. We lived in a rambling house on 2 acres on the Erie Canal with a 200 year old grave yard as our only neighbors. My kids were also very rooted in that house, and my oldest does not like change! Then on my second trip to the Villages, I found the place I had been looking for, politely referred to as the “Historic Side”. It just felt right. I rented a place for December and January and went back to New York to have my heart operation.

It begam as a Vacation scam

2008-09-28T18:04:00.000-07:00

September 28, 2008
We have just returned from watching football with our posse at one of our 9 country clubs. The Buffalo Bills won again today. 4Wins/0 Losses for the first time in a decade. All is right with the world.

This blogging stuff is new to me. I called my daughter, Erika this morning and asked for a quick course. She thinks I will enjoy blogging as an avenue to vent about the election. I think she may be right.

Let me talk today about how we found the Villages. I worked for a component division of General Motors. Harrison Radiator, as it was called when we signed on, we manufactured heat transfer products for GM cars and trucks. Harrison employed over 11,000 employees in 1977 when I started and the new lean Delphi Lockport is now down to about 2000 folks making less than half the money we made when we were told to retire. That story is for another day.

A co-worker, Ruth Ann, brought a video into my office one Friday afternoon, and we plugged it into the VCR and had a hoot watching the line dancing, golfers in the Villages. My family loves to travel and being a thrifty traveler, we suffered time share pitches and what ever else we had to endure to subsidize our vacations through the years. The lure of a really cheap vacation in the form of a “Lifestyle Tour” was too much for me to resist. I signed us up for 5 days in April, even though I was just 50 and my husband was 49. My husband, Wayne was not as enthusiastic. He watched the tape and complained that we were no way near ready to join the geriatric group. That was 2003.

Ignoring his protests we flew into Orlando and were greeted by a Limo driver in his early 80’s who told us of the 800 player strong softball leagues that he plays on. Wayne’s interest was slightly peaked as he gave up softball in his thirty’s and saw an opportunity to again be the young ringer on a team. Peaked interest or not his arms were still defiantly crossed as he prepared to hate this vacation that I had planned. “What are we doing here?” he asked , “we are probably 10 years away from retirement and can’t afford this place in any event.” We had one daughter, Erika in her freshmen year at Niagara University, an expensive private college in NY and the other daughter, Briana was still in high school.

It was late when we arrived and we were dropped off at our Villa well after everyone else was down for the night. The driver cheerfully pointed out some of the highlights of Village living and told us to call the sales center in the morning for our Welcome package. I expected the worse. For the bargain vacation (About $25 per night) in very nice accommodations, including the gift of $75 per day in Village dollars, I expected the sales pitch would be over the top high pressure. Nothing could have been further from the truth.

We were used to trying to avoid the obnoxious sales pitches from time share promoters, and were told that we could visit models if we liked, but the package was waiting for us with no obligation. We picked up our package at the Spanish Springs Sales Center and began spending Village Bucks like shoplifting kids in a candy store. Village dollars were currency good only in the Villages, but that proved to be quite a buffet of goodies. We rented a golf cart, went to lunch at Katie Bells and even picked up a bottle of wine at the Village owned Liquor store. Now they had Wayne’s attention. He was still suspicious of the friendly waves from passing villagers, “No one is THAT happy.” He complained

I was curious after several days of exploring, getting lost and spending the Village booty, why no one was badgering us to look at houses. Didn’t they think we were worthy? Had they discovered that we were just young stowaway’s sneaking in for a look under false pretense. I guiltily called the sales rep whose card was included in my welcome package and he assured me that if we wanted to see some properties he could probably find time. Wow! This place is very different.

Our Villa was probably 20 minutes by cart from the Town Square and we sometime had trouble navigating the Labyrinth of Neighborhoods (Villages), but we were having a great time. The sales rep set up tee times for Wayne and showed us several surprisingly affordable (Under $100k) villas and ranch homes. Other than the need to rescue our daughter Briana, from a fight with her friend in Daytona we had a wonderful stress free vacation. She liked it here too. We went to the pools, saw a movie and settled in like residents. If I had my way we would have put money down on a lot that trip but Wayne was still hesitant. He was however waving back now happily to the passing villagers in golf carts like the new mayor. This is like Disney for adults, we concluded.

We went home with plenty to think about, but we still were years away from this option. How unpredictable life can be.

Leisureville

2008-09-27T21:02:00.000-07:00

This is a response to Andrew D. Blechman’s interesting, entertaining, misleading and well researched book, Leisureville.

I am one of the Villages baby boomers that you refer to in your book. My bio goes like this: I am a college graduate from Western New York. I have been a social activist since high school. Active in Local politics all of my life, community volunteerism was piled on top of a full time job in the auto industry, raising two children and being active in my union. I helped other parents in our school district raise over $400,000. to provide extra curricular activities for my children’s school, when the “Greatest” generation refused to pass budgets to support them. I have served on the boards of several not for profits and leadership councils, served dinners to the less fortunate and on and on. We are the first generation of women expected to juggle all of the balls. We have gladly and successfully done that.

I object to the notion that we have moved into this community to escape some social obligation that Andrew feels we owe his children. I looked carefully for suggestions from the author as to how we young retirees should behave. We have been pushed into early retirement to allow greedy corporations to employ younger workers at reduced wages and benefits. I got the feeling that his answer was vaguely that we should live above retail stores, in small apartments in urban areas, so we can baby-sit, chasing our children’s careers around the country living near, but not with them until we are ready for nursing homes, and hopefully early deaths so not to use too much of the limited resources that our gracious children benevolently bestow upon us. The only social activism I hear the author participating in is the selfish pursuit of playgrounds for his children.

I could easily have taken another job after my company pushed us out, competing with younger workers, but with unemployment at record levels, is that really what would be best for our country? I could have remained up north in my 3000 square foot home where I raised my family, on a fixed income struggling and complaining about paying ever increasing property taxes, and voting on your children’s school budgets, but is that really what would be best for my community?

I have taught social commitment to my children and am happy to pass the torch to them. I am more than willing to help and mentor, but it is their turn to take the wheel. We are not a society that values our elders, or learns from history. We tend to cast off and disregard our past and are therefore doomed to repeat mistakes. I feel that my choices have a better chance of not repeating the mistakes of the last generation, who held the reigns too long and mentored too little. That is not checking out.

I wish intergenerational planned communities existed like the Villages. Sun, safety, similar interests are the things that drew us to the villages, not the absence of children. Authentic is a word that the author used to describe the community where he lives, but accidental would be more descriptive. Haphazard development is how our suburbs have erupted. The city people that could afford it, escaped to the suburbs, leaving only those that could not afford to move to struggle in poverty in our urban centers. They took their tax base and cheated the inner city schools out of diversity and funding, never looking back. Talk about social conditions that ruined our traditionally urban neighborhoods, look to the suburbs. We Americans should realize that the only way to provide successful communities for the future is to plan them. There is no hope for success in the accidental way our communities now emerge. We have the ability to plan new communities but have only done it on a small experimental scale. It may take an intergenerational Village to secure the successful community of the future. There is the topic for your next book Andrew.